Both as a standalone and as part of the DSOTS album, you can take this lyric as read. As a matter of public record, Jourgensen's drug intake was legendary even in the 1980s. By the late 90s, in his own words, he was grappling with massive addiction issues and had lost almost everything: friends, spouse, money and had nearly died more than once. "Dark Side of the Spoon" is a both funny & sad title for an album made by a musical genius who was losing the plot; and this song is a message to his fans & friends saying he knows it. It's painful to listen to so I'm glad the "Keith Richards of industrial metals" wised up and cleaned up. Well done sir.
I still think to myself and wonder if this was worth it
For it seems that these days I can't stand still for a moment
(I'm sick of drifting)
And my feet won't rest or re-oppress their pivoting
Oh Misery, your familiar face still lingers around
(Oh Harmony, I never see your face around)
Needless to say, I'm a victim of Lunacy
but that can't begin to explain how
This happened to me, for I still can't believe
That my life is now constantly pulsed in three
And now I can see
This vast devilry you've cast upon me
I'll be stuck in these steps for all eternity
And who would it be if it were not me?
My life once worth living is enslaved by treachery
It seems to be that Hell's high waters
Have brought forth to me an unspeakable horror
I can't seem to just stand in one place
And Misery won't loosen her callused grip
But if I trip, perhaps her hand could start to slip
And I've tried my best, but my feet, they will not rest
I'm oh so conscious and that's why Lunacy will tear me apart
Harmony, an unfamiliar face that now lingers around
Needless, so needless to say
That we're only victims after all
You help me keep these cursed legs from swaying all around
But this time, they'll agree with me
Oh surely this will contend with my misery
So I begin hacking through flesh and bone with fine cutlery
Now surely this will amend all my dignity
(I'm sick of drifting)
And as this weight is lifted, I'm now content as an amputee
You've used every moment to torment me
Now severed and screaming, I will at last be free
For it seems that these days I can't stand still for a moment
(I'm sick of drifting)
And my feet won't rest or re-oppress their pivoting
Oh Misery, your familiar face still lingers around
(Oh Harmony, I never see your face around)
Needless to say, I'm a victim of Lunacy
but that can't begin to explain how
This happened to me, for I still can't believe
That my life is now constantly pulsed in three
And now I can see
This vast devilry you've cast upon me
I'll be stuck in these steps for all eternity
And who would it be if it were not me?
My life once worth living is enslaved by treachery
It seems to be that Hell's high waters
Have brought forth to me an unspeakable horror
I can't seem to just stand in one place
And Misery won't loosen her callused grip
But if I trip, perhaps her hand could start to slip
And I've tried my best, but my feet, they will not rest
I'm oh so conscious and that's why Lunacy will tear me apart
Harmony, an unfamiliar face that now lingers around
Needless, so needless to say
That we're only victims after all
You help me keep these cursed legs from swaying all around
But this time, they'll agree with me
Oh surely this will contend with my misery
So I begin hacking through flesh and bone with fine cutlery
Now surely this will amend all my dignity
(I'm sick of drifting)
And as this weight is lifted, I'm now content as an amputee
You've used every moment to torment me
Now severed and screaming, I will at last be free
Lyrics submitted by sokorny
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In regards to the meaning of this song:
Before a live performance on the EP Five Stories Falling, Geoff states “It’s about the last time I went to visit my grandmother in Columbus, and I saw that she was dying and it was the last time I was going to see her. It is about realizing how young you are, but how quickly you can go.”
That’s the thing about Geoff and his sublime poetry, you think it’s about one thing, but really it’s about something entirely different. But the lyrics are still universal and omnipresent, ubiquitous, even. So relatable. That’s one thing I love about this band. I also love their live performances, raw energy and Geoff’s beautiful, imperfectly perfect vocals. His voice soothes my aching soul.
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There is still an amazing amount of hope and will in the lyrics; and the lyrics themselve rank and easy five. If only music was stronger it would be one of those great radio songs that you hear once a week 20 years after it was released. The imagery is almost tear-jerking ("City lights lay out before us", "Speeds so fast felt like I was drunk"), and the idea of starting from nothing and just driving and working and denigrating yourself for a chance at being just above poverty, then losing in the end is just painful and inspiring at the same time.
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Anyone else get a sense of Haken during particular sections of this track? Especially the vocals about 4 minutes in??