Ever the Same

I read a recent article at the time of the albums release where Rob said he wrote this for his wife during a time when she had a 'lingering illness'. It didn't describe the illness but I think it is a very pretty song that shows he wanted her to know that he was going through this with her and he'd be right by her side during it all.

I think that the song tells us that life is hard sometimes and that you should allow somebody to share the pain with you when you are in dire need of help or assistence. he is showing that there are people in your life that would be able to assuage your miseries and save you from oblivion.

That was one of matchbox 20's first singles, "3 a.m."

Although Thomas has written a number of songs about those close to him and their illnesses, this song exemplifies some of the overarching themes present in his music and the music of Matchbox 20 in general. Of course, one of these is the idea of co-dependent weakness making both of the characters of the song stronger than they were before they acknowledged their weakness and the weakness in each other. The narrator recalls a night of great weakness between him and another person, who is nameless and generalized, at least for the sake of the song. While there is some evidence that the other individual is his wife who suffers from a rare, debilitating autoimmune disease that causes her bouts of pain, the song can be taken as something a bit more universal, meaning that the listener (taking on the voice of the narrator) could be speaking to anyone who has come to be an source of emotional support.

The narrator offers his love (which he seems to consider a weak compensation) in exchange for mutual reliance. The narrator also emphasizes over and over again in the refrain that things will be “ever the same”—alluding to perhaps their relationship, situations, or feelings never changing. It is also a song about trusting: the other person will be there, will not leave, and will remember how brilliant they were together before they were “falling apart.” The “before” is the basis for the relationship: they were “brave like soldiers” one night when the narrator was sharing his emotional pain (anxiety and depression on the part of Rob, no doubt). We might surmise that another period of pain is present, but this time, it is the nameless character who is listening to the narrator. To emphasize relationship—the dependence that they share—the narrator recalls this other instance that occurred “under the pale moonlight” so that he can explain how much that moment meant to him: “I couldn’t tell you then, but I’m telling you now.” In other words, he was too broken, too weakened to tell the nameless character what the act of kindness meant to him. However, now he can give back, and in doing so, he articulates the dependence: “I'll be there for you, and you'll be there for me.” When one is weak, the other will carry them both. The narrator admits his own fallibility as much as he offers himself as a source of support.

Perhaps this is one of the most beautiful undercurrent themes of Thomas’ music: the idea of two broken people finding solace in each other.

Thank you fides75, I didn't know that. It is certainly a nice song.

The illness is some kind of rare immune system disease os some sort. I believe Mari is alright now, but I have to imagine it was a hard point for both Rob and Mari. Man, first Rob's mother gets sick and spawns a great song, then Rob's wife gets sick and spawns a great song. Poor Rob. But this is a beautiful song, and it gives hope that Rob could have more solo success. Maybe his softening isn't a bad thing?

One word: Beautiful.

This is one of the most amazing songs ive ever heard. hands down. Just hits so close at home

Rob wrote this for his wife during her illness??? that is soooo sweet, and thanx for lettin us know by the way, fides75... this song is beautiful, my fave line is "just let me hold you while you're falling apart, just let me hold you so we'll both fall down"... what else can I say, Rob Thomas is awesome!!!

By the way...what was the song Rob made for his mother when she was ill?? curious, thanx:D