I think much like another song “Anti-Matter” (that's also on the same album as this song), this one is also is inspired by a horrifying van crash the band experienced on Nov 3, 2022. This, much like the other track, sounds like it's an extension what they shared while huddled in the wreckage, as they helped frontman Garrett Russell stem the bleeding from his head wound while he was under the temporary effects of a concussion. The track speaks of where the mind goes at the most desperate & desolate of times, when it just about slips away to all but disconnect itself, and the aftermath.
Oh I can't take another heartache
Though you say you're my friend, I'm at my wit's end
You say your love is bonafide, but that don't coincide
With the things that you do
And when I ask you to be nice, you say
You've gotta be cruel to be kind, in the right measure
Cruel to be kind, it's a very good sign
Cruel to be kind, means that I love you, baby
(You've gotta be cruel)
You gotta be cruel to be kind
Well I do my best to understand dear
But you still mystify and I want to know why
I pick myself up off the ground
To have you knock me back down, again and again
And when I ask you to explain, you say
You've gotta be cruel to be kind, in the right measure
Cruel to be kind, it's a very good sign
Cruel to be kind, means that I love you, baby
(You've gotta be cruel)
You gotta be cruel to be kind
Well I do my best to understand dear
But you still mystify and I want to know why
I pick myself up off the ground
To have you knock me back down, again and again
And when I ask you to explain, you say
You've gotta be cruel to be kind, in the right measure
Cruel to be kind, it's a very good sign
Cruel to be kind, means that I love you baby
(You've gotta be cruel)
You gotta be cruel to be kind
(Cruel to be kind), oh in the right measure
(Cruel to be kind), it's a very very very good sign
(Cruel to be kind), it means that I love you, baby
(You've gotta be cruel)
You gotta be cruel to be kind
(Cruel to be kind), oh in the right measure
(Cruel to be kind), yes it's a very very very good sign
(Cruel to be kind), it means that I love you, baby
(You've gotta be cruel)
You gotta be cruel to be kind
(Cruel to be kind), oh in the right measure
(Cruel to be kind), yes it's a very very very good sign
(Cruel to be kind), it means that I love you
Though you say you're my friend, I'm at my wit's end
You say your love is bonafide, but that don't coincide
With the things that you do
And when I ask you to be nice, you say
You've gotta be cruel to be kind, in the right measure
Cruel to be kind, it's a very good sign
Cruel to be kind, means that I love you, baby
(You've gotta be cruel)
You gotta be cruel to be kind
Well I do my best to understand dear
But you still mystify and I want to know why
I pick myself up off the ground
To have you knock me back down, again and again
And when I ask you to explain, you say
You've gotta be cruel to be kind, in the right measure
Cruel to be kind, it's a very good sign
Cruel to be kind, means that I love you, baby
(You've gotta be cruel)
You gotta be cruel to be kind
Well I do my best to understand dear
But you still mystify and I want to know why
I pick myself up off the ground
To have you knock me back down, again and again
And when I ask you to explain, you say
You've gotta be cruel to be kind, in the right measure
Cruel to be kind, it's a very good sign
Cruel to be kind, means that I love you baby
(You've gotta be cruel)
You gotta be cruel to be kind
(Cruel to be kind), oh in the right measure
(Cruel to be kind), it's a very very very good sign
(Cruel to be kind), it means that I love you, baby
(You've gotta be cruel)
You gotta be cruel to be kind
(Cruel to be kind), oh in the right measure
(Cruel to be kind), yes it's a very very very good sign
(Cruel to be kind), it means that I love you, baby
(You've gotta be cruel)
You gotta be cruel to be kind
(Cruel to be kind), oh in the right measure
(Cruel to be kind), yes it's a very very very good sign
(Cruel to be kind), it means that I love you
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Before i read anyone else's comments and alter mine... This is what i think this song is about:
It's pretty much obviously a couple although this could apply to friendships also. The guy clearly pretty much loves this girl and everything about her and treats her how he feels about her which is with kindness. But the girl doesn't so easily give back the same 100% dedication/love that the guy is willing to give. Instead, she sticks around, but says some cutting remarks from time to time which leave him feeling probably a little shot down all the time, and he wishes she would just be nice. You've gotta be cruel to be kind is the response that the girlfriend gives when asked by the boyfriend why she just can't be nice. And by being cruel to be kind, the girlfriend is basically answering, "Overall, I am nice. I'm just brutally honest with my thoughts and feelings."
Anyways I have memories of my old best friend singing this song and I miss her.. so i love this song
The term was invented by Shakespeare in his tragedy Hamlet. To be “cruel to be kind” is to cause someone pain for his or her own good. Telling someone something that will hurt them because it's better for them in the long run. It appears like you're trying to hurt them when in fact, you're looking out for their best interest.
Was it really? Cool. I understand the sentiment but don't subscribe to it. You interpreted it perfectly.
SweetCheeks2, a scenario of "cruel to be kind" would be that you're out in a club and see your best friend's partner passionately making out with someone else. You know that your friend is under the impression their relationship is monogamous. So keeping your mouth shut and minding your own business would be "kind" because you know this information would hurt your friend but telling your friend what you saw would be "cruel to be kind" because the information would hurt your friend but she or he would be aware of the truth and able to make an informed decision to stay with that person or not. If your friend decides not to stay he or she might find a partner who is more honest and they can negotiate a relationship that works for them both. In this way your "cruelty" of giving your friend the negative information would help them in the long run. You would be being "cruel to be kind" because you love your friend and are looking out for their best interest. Another example might be not starting a relationship with someone who's interested in you because you know you're not right for them and they deserve to be with a more appropriate person for them. It might hurt that person initially but it's better for them in the long run. In these examples, hurting someone is a way of caring for them and showing love to them. I would say that MOST "don't subscribe to it" because many prefer to stay uninvolved rather than be a messenger of bad news...or have that fling with someone who you know should not be with you [because you're selfish and attracted to them] then dump them once you've had your fun. I prefer to be honest up front. Even if it hurts someone temporarily, honesty is kinder in my opinion.
It's a take off from the Shakespeare line "...cruel to be kind." He's good to her, but she's not so good to him. He just can't figger that one out!
When I first heard the song I took as meaning that she wasn't interested in him, though he clearly was in her. She thinks that the best thing to do is be mean to him so he doesn't start to like her anymore, only to have a worse heartbreak later on. But after reading all the lyrics I'm not so sure... oh well.
C'mon, guys. She CLEARLY loves him, she flat out says it. She just has that typical female roundabout way of showing it. Guys, haven't ya'll ever gone through that stage in a relationship when your girlfriend is pissed at you for God knows what and she treats friends (even your slob ass friends whom she normally detests)/acquaintances/even complete strangers with
with what??
Hatred (or in this case, seeming cruelty, in the guise of anger, cutting remarks...) is not the opposite of love, apathy is. Just the fact that she's paying enough attention to him proves that she cares. As well as some of the other posts, stating that being truthful, though seemingly cruel in the short-term, for one's own good is proof of love. And "you always hurt the one you love".
I'd say those three points wrapped together go a long way to explaining the meaning of CTBK, to me.
I don't think there is anything deep here. It's just a fun, smirky song, based on a funny line from Shakespeare. Lowe is so good at this kind of thing.
To me, this song is about someone who is in a relationship with a Narcissist who is \'gaslighting\' them.\nPeople with Narcissistic Personality Disorder like to put people down constantly, under the pretence of it being for their own good.\nYes, we all need home truths sometimes but this song goes way beyond that.\nJust be kind to be kind.
kfe2 thats awful when you take a kid to get a jag its sore but you're helping them in the long run so thats "cruel to be kind" therefore i agree with TheSilverNoble's original opinion and i cant find anything when reading the lyrics to suggest otherwise
Woman are cruel thats it.