(My charade, my charade
My grenade, my grenade
My charade, my charade
My grenade, my grenade)

Stay on the inside
Don't let your secret out
Reveal the landslide
That's always pouring

Down, down like the rain
Can you see me drownin'?
Drifting away
They'll never understand

Why I disappear
The voices that I hear
Calling me into the darkness

I'll breathe in, I'll breathe out
So sick of holding it down
When no one sees
This mess of me
It's okay, I'm alright
Even though I'm dyin' inside
I'm never free
Of this mess of me

I dance with demons
Conceal this double life
No rhyme or reason
For the war behind these

Eyes, don't get too close
Do you see what I see?
Haunting like a ghost
I'm never free

I'll breathe in, I'll breathe out
So sick of holding it down
When no one sees
This mess of me
It's okay, I'm alright
Even though I'm dyin' inside
I'm never free
Of this mess of me
This mess of me
No, I'm never free

My charade, my grenade
I will lie for you
I will follow you
Until the end
I'm ashamed, I'm afraid
If they knew the truth
Of my abuse
What would they do?
What would they do?

My charade, my grenade
If they knew the truth
Of my abuse

I'll breathe in, I'll breathe out
So sick of holding it down
When no one sees
This mess of me
It's okay, I'm alright
Even though I'm dyin' inside
I'm never free
Oh, of this mess of me
I'm never free
Of this mess of me



Lyrics submitted by EternalTearsOfSorrow

Mess Of Me song meanings
Add Your Thoughts

1 Comment

sort form View by:
  • 0
    My Interpretation

    This is a song about the feeling of keeping your emotions and trauma a secret from the world.

    EternalTearsOfSorrowon July 28, 2020   Link

Add your thoughts

Log in now to tell us what you think this song means.

Don’t have an account? Create an account with SongMeanings to post comments, submit lyrics, and more. It’s super easy, we promise!

More Featured Meanings

Album art
Fortnight
Taylor Swift
The song 'Fortnight' by Taylor Swift and Post Malone tells a story about strong feelings, complicated relationships, and secret wishes. It talks about love, betrayal, and wanting someone who doesn't feel the same. The word 'fortnight' shows short-lived happiness and guilty pleasures, leading to sadness. It shows how messy relationships can be and the results of hiding emotions. “I was supposed to be sent away / But they forgot to come and get me,” she kickstarts the song in the first verse with lines suggesting an admission to a hospital for people with mental illnesses. She goes in the verse admitting her lover is the reason why she is like this. In the chorus, she sings about their time in love and reflects on how he has now settled with someone else. “I took the miracle move-on drug, the effects were temporary / And I love you, it’s ruining my life,” on the second verse she details her struggles to forget about him and the negative effects of her failure. “Thought of callin’ ya, but you won’t pick up / ‘Nother fortnight lost in America,” Post Malone sings in the outro.
Album art
Dreamwalker
Silent Planet
I think much like another song “Anti-Matter” (that's also on the same album as this song), this one is also is inspired by a horrifying van crash the band experienced on Nov 3, 2022. This, much like the other track, sounds like it's an extension what they shared while huddled in the wreckage, as they helped frontman Garrett Russell stem the bleeding from his head wound while he was under the temporary effects of a concussion. The track speaks of where the mind goes at the most desperate & desolate of times, when it just about slips away to all but disconnect itself, and the aftermath.
Album art
Mountain Song
Jane's Addiction
Jane's Addiction vocalist Perry Farrell gives Adam Reader some heartfelt insight into Jane’s Addiction's hard rock manifesto "Mountain Song", which was the second single from their revolutionary album Nothing's Shocking. Mountain song was first recorded in 1986 and appeared on the soundtrack to the film Dudes starring Jon Cryer. The version on Nothing's Shocking was re-recorded in 1988. "'Mountain Song' was actually about... I hate to say it but... drugs. Climbing this mountain and getting as high as you can, and then coming down that mountain," reveals Farrell. "What it feels to descend from the mountain top... not easy at all. The ascension is tough but exhilarating. Getting down is... it's a real bummer. Drugs is not for everybody obviously. For me, I wanted to experience the heights, and the lows come along with it." "There's a part - 'Cash in now honey, cash in Miss Smith.' Miss Smith is my Mother; our last name was Smith. Cashing in when she cashed in her life. So... she decided that, to her... at that time, she was desperate. Life wasn't worth it for her, that was her opinion. Some people think, never take your life, and some people find that their life isn't worth living. She was in love with my Dad, and my Dad was not faithful to her, and it broke her heart. She was very desperate and she did something that I know she regrets."
Album art
Magical
Ed Sheeran
How would you describe the feeling of being in love? For Ed Sheeran, the word is “Magical.” in HIS three-minute album opener, he makes an attempt to capture the beauty and delicacy of true love with words. He describes the magic of it all over a bright Pop song produced by Aaron Dessner.
Album art
Blue
Ed Sheeran
“Blue” is a song about a love that is persisting in the discomfort of the person experiencing the emotion. Ed Sheeran reflects on love lost, and although he wishes his former partner find happiness, he cannot but admit his feelings are still very much there. He expresses the realization that he might never find another on this stringed instrumental by Aaron Dessner.