The beginning is talking about whether the veteran will get over his memories at war. He can't sleep (which means, no, he will not get over them), and is waiting for dawn. It feels good to be treated special (like a r"ose").
But then he reflects that he doesn't like the special attention. He doesn't feel like a hero ("don't life me up")
The next one might be a stretch, but the "bats all dissolving in a row" could be his friends, with whom he used to play baseball. The "wishy-washy darkness that cannot let go" is Death. It's fickle and kills the veteran's comrades at random.
He can never forget his friends' deaths ("And I cannot let go"), but he praises God for their friendship, even though he allowed them to die ("So I thank the Lord/ and I thank His sword/ though it me mincing up the morning slightly bored"). He also thanks him that he was spared and the enemy defeated, though to God this is commonplace, and perhaps got clumsy with "His sword" and took some of the veteran's friends along with the enemy.
Morning comes and the veteran does not cheer up with the coming light. He relives the memories of his friends' deaths ("I watch you go").
"Sky looks like a road" is the path to war he took as a young man.
"Dragons... built to have and hold" are the machines of war he used to operate.
"Machines... dropped from great heights lovingly" are bombs, dropped out love for his family and country, not love for violence or death.
"Bellies ache with many bumblebees" is the nervousness, fear, and anxiety associated with death and war. Also could represent being shot in the gut by machine guns.
The veteran is free to do what he wants, but is weak and helpless ("I do as I please... now I'm on my knees"). He thinks about his departed friends often ("Your skin... stir into my tea," also a reference to the gore of war). "I'm watching you/ and you are starry..." He looks at the sky and think about how his friends are in Heaven. He is crushed by grief, and needs to sit down, though it feels like falling. He lets no one else see and "check[s] a frown," or does not show how he is really feeling.
He loves his town (perhaps said with sarcasm). They celebrated his return, is constantly remembered every Veteran's Day. Yet no one really cares ("celebrated sourly").
He "Waltzes with the open sea", referencing his isolation from others. He clams up and shoves his memories down, deep inside of him like a "clam, crab, cockle, cowrie."
He wishes someone could really know and understand him "Will you just look at me?" He wants someone to care.
The ending vocalizations sound like a wolf howling, which only happens when either it has found food or, more appropriate to this interpretation, is separated from his pack. The veteran is longing for his friends.
I think it could be about war veterans.
The beginning is talking about whether the veteran will get over his memories at war. He can't sleep (which means, no, he will not get over them), and is waiting for dawn. It feels good to be treated special (like a r"ose").
But then he reflects that he doesn't like the special attention. He doesn't feel like a hero ("don't life me up")
The next one might be a stretch, but the "bats all dissolving in a row" could be his friends, with whom he used to play baseball. The "wishy-washy darkness that cannot let go" is Death. It's fickle and kills the veteran's comrades at random.
He can never forget his friends' deaths ("And I cannot let go"), but he praises God for their friendship, even though he allowed them to die ("So I thank the Lord/ and I thank His sword/ though it me mincing up the morning slightly bored"). He also thanks him that he was spared and the enemy defeated, though to God this is commonplace, and perhaps got clumsy with "His sword" and took some of the veteran's friends along with the enemy.
Morning comes and the veteran does not cheer up with the coming light. He relives the memories of his friends' deaths ("I watch you go").
"Sky looks like a road" is the path to war he took as a young man. "Dragons... built to have and hold" are the machines of war he used to operate. "Machines... dropped from great heights lovingly" are bombs, dropped out love for his family and country, not love for violence or death. "Bellies ache with many bumblebees" is the nervousness, fear, and anxiety associated with death and war. Also could represent being shot in the gut by machine guns.
The veteran is free to do what he wants, but is weak and helpless ("I do as I please... now I'm on my knees"). He thinks about his departed friends often ("Your skin... stir into my tea," also a reference to the gore of war). "I'm watching you/ and you are starry..." He looks at the sky and think about how his friends are in Heaven. He is crushed by grief, and needs to sit down, though it feels like falling. He lets no one else see and "check[s] a frown," or does not show how he is really feeling.
He loves his town (perhaps said with sarcasm). They celebrated his return, is constantly remembered every Veteran's Day. Yet no one really cares ("celebrated sourly").
He "Waltzes with the open sea", referencing his isolation from others. He clams up and shoves his memories down, deep inside of him like a "clam, crab, cockle, cowrie."
He wishes someone could really know and understand him "Will you just look at me?" He wants someone to care.
The ending vocalizations sound like a wolf howling, which only happens when either it has found food or, more appropriate to this interpretation, is separated from his pack. The veteran is longing for his friends.