Lyric discussion by emilykrame 

Great song, cheers Alex Turner. this is what I think, it is probably false.

In the first verse,

He is saying that there is a band singing about San Francisco. He uses the word "fake" because they probably have never been there (hence the third verse), so they don't know what they are talking about. He is saying they are singing at a fake wedding without a bride or groom, meaning that their gig is crap (because they couldn't get a better one). Then, he is using irony with the "super cool band", because they are obviously prestigious posers who have no idea what they are talking about. They think indeed, that they are a "super cool band", when in reality they suck. He uses more irony by saying "weekend rockstars", we all know that there is no such thing- you are either a rockstar or you are not. A weekend rockstar is just another term showing that the band he is describing thinks that they are the shit. He's basically calling them fake and posers. (making fun of them with the "white wine", they probably drink it to look classy)

And then for the "I don't wanna hear you, kick me out, kick me out" No one wants to hear this shitty band, and they all want to leave the gig.

3rd verse, they are tediously going on about San Francisco because they aren't original to come up with anything else to sing about, and people are starting to get bored and wanting to leave. "there are a few bored faces wishing they weren't there"

4th verse, this band must not be used to using quality equipment, or must not be experienced at all, or it just gets awkwardly silent and the microphone starts to squeak because even it doesn't want to hear this shitty music anymore. A young girl [teenager probably, they are always on their phones] is looking for a way to get out of this gig, and her friends picking her up, she's happy to death that her friend saved her, and she calls the band [fucking wank], obviously saying she's had the shittiest time ever and they suck.

5th verse, "his bird said its amazing, though so all thats left... but deaf" it seems to me as though the teenager's friend is replying to what she said in the previous verse, his bird being one of the bands lover's? And if so, everyone says "love is blind", and this proves that love is also deaf, because who could love anyone who participates in this shitty band?

6th verse, "he talks of SF, he's from Hunter's Bar ... far" It is revealed this band talks/sings about San Francisco over and over again, and they've never even been there. This is probably showing us how bands these days, the poser ones, sing about all this stuff that hasn't even happened to them, or they sing about bull shit, are terrible live, and everyones looking for an escape to leave.

7th verse, "And yeah, I'd love to tell you... Rotherham" Alex is basically saying shut the fuck up, stop singing about stuff you don't know about, if your sequel to San Francisco is New York City, you STILL don't know what you are talking about because you are from Rotherham, England. Stick to what you know. A bandwagon has two meanings, one being a stage or a movable platform, that bands go on for parades and such and a certain activity that has suddenly become popular, or mainstream. (this is what makes the wording in this line pure genius) Everything music wise, or even in general these days, that is mainstream or popular is really crap lyrics and everything wise. These shitty boy bands that sing about things that they don't know about at all, or these stupid popstars and people who think they are the shit are very popular right now. He's saying get off the platform and [just because you are singing mainstream shit, it doesn't make it good] put down the handbook (supposedly on how to be a successful band? how to be popular in this generation?)

anyways, this song is pure genius, Alex is a boss in recognizing the complete bull shit mainstream music is today. Anyone, and i mean anyone could write the type of shit they put on the radio, quite depressing. This is my interpretation of the song, probably not correct.

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