basically, she wants to be a much better person than she feels she is. she makes the effort but isnt able to overcome her urges nd thoughts. when she is telling who shes singing to to prey nd bring the virgin home for luck,nd the bolted door nd whatever, shes trying to say RUN without saying it. she knows shes no good for herself nd she doesnt want to bring this person under with her, but she wants to change for the better nd become a little more like this person. in a sence, she uses the person to wrap her mind around something so she can try nd salvage whats left of her self esteem, but all the same in the process breaking it down lower. she knows it isnt going to last nd she doesnt want to be alone so she suppresses whatever shes feeling to her partner nd acts like everythings alright, even when she knows its falling to pieces because she cant control herself, much less the situation. when it all wraps up, shes lost her man, nd she knows theres nothing left to back to. shes right back in the same depressing hole she was to begin with, without hope, nd not knowing what to do other than try.
basically, she wants to be a much better person than she feels she is. she makes the effort but isnt able to overcome her urges nd thoughts. when she is telling who shes singing to to prey nd bring the virgin home for luck,nd the bolted door nd whatever, shes trying to say RUN without saying it. she knows shes no good for herself nd she doesnt want to bring this person under with her, but she wants to change for the better nd become a little more like this person. in a sence, she uses the person to wrap her mind around something so she can try nd salvage whats left of her self esteem, but all the same in the process breaking it down lower. she knows it isnt going to last nd she doesnt want to be alone so she suppresses whatever shes feeling to her partner nd acts like everythings alright, even when she knows its falling to pieces because she cant control herself, much less the situation. when it all wraps up, shes lost her man, nd she knows theres nothing left to back to. shes right back in the same depressing hole she was to begin with, without hope, nd not knowing what to do other than try.
its a vicious cycle.