Lyric discussion by ZinbobDan 

"outside the daimond" refers to life outside of baseball. Yes "the diamond" actually makes up maybe 1/4 the playing field, but often that term is used as a euphamism for the enire field of play. Like "the gridiron" in American football, or whatever corresponding term in everyone else's football. It's the baseball manager who is often referred to as being "on the bench." I'd imagine this verse refers to a retired player who's life is empty after leaving baseball (since leaving "the diamond"), so he longs to come back as a manager (return to the bench).

Also, I agree that the pitcher, while maybe inspired by Sandy Koufax, is just a random character. I also think in the song's PRIMARY meaning (not discounting that it might have a layered meaning or have other little thoughts invoked), baseball just provides the setting. Whether or not Mike Piazza is gay is just something two carefree lovers discuss to pass the time on a cool summer evening. Later on, in their hotel room, they "continue the debate" over Piazza's sexuality...just for something to do during their honeymoon.

My interpretation is that baseball is something of a red herring - a distraction. I find the most meaning in the line "you'll take care of her, I know it...not what she deserves." Stuart knows he can't provide for this girl, as the family he wishes to take her away from; but she deserves someone who can make her happy as well. The baseball game is an enjoyable distraction. Discussing Piazza's sexuality is a distraction. It's an avoidance of the reality of life. The pitcher in the song has made baseball his life. When he leaves baseball he doesn't know how to live and can't manage, so he longs to return to baseball. Sure, elope to San Francisco, but what about after the honeymoon?

How brilliant! Just as Stuart's lovers are distracted from the realities of life by baseball, the listener is distracted from the realities of the lyric's meaning by a barage of references to baseball. But that's just my take.

This is by far the best interpretation of the song to me. I feel the same way about all the baseball references. I think they are just "filler" to distract the listener from the real meaning.

i feel like he mentions "Piazza, New York catcher, are you straight or are you gay?" to focus on the fact that nobody's actually paying attention to the game; but rather, the media and the people are all focusing their primary attention on something as silly as one's sexual orientation/preferences; meanwhile, "Ferdinand" and his wayward girl are ducking under such attention to other's sexual lives as they hide their own adventures from the rest of the world.

Baseball has always been called "America's Pastime" - literally, it's known as the way American's "pass the time". This comment made me realize for the first time that this song is also invoking the film "The Graduate" - a classic romantic drama set in the SF Bay Area. **Spoiler Alert for the one person who hasn't seen The Graduate***

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