So this has been.my favorite song of OTEP's since it came out in 2004, and I always thought it was a song about a child's narrative of suffering in an abusive Christian home. But now that I am revisiting the lyrics, I am seeing something totally new.
This song could be gospel of John but from the perspective of Jesus.
Jesus was NOT having a good time up to and during the crucifixion. Everyone in the known world at the time looked to him with fear, admiration or disgust and he was constantly being asked questions. He spoke in "verses, prophesies and curses". He had made an enemy of the state, and believed the world was increasingly wicked and fallen from grace, or that he was in the "mouth of madness".
The spine of atlas is the structure that allows the titan to hold the world up. Jesus challenged the state and in doing so became a celebrated resistance figure. It also made him public enemy #1.
All of this happened simply because he was doing his thing, not because of any agenda he had or strategy.
And then he gets scourged (storm of thorns)
There are some plot holes here but I think it's an interesting interpretation.
I fell in love with a wind-up souvenir
I bought it downtown as I was on my way to meet you
She sounds the like the songs you used to sing to put me to sleep
Now that you're gone, she's all that I've left to hold
And I feel so all alone
No one's gonna fix me when I'm broke
How do you cry with inanimate eyes?
You're never gonna smile with the way that you are
And I feel so all alone
I can't be you
I thought you might appreciate
The way that she dances
The painted look upon her face
She must have come from the sun
I want to take her through the park
Where she'd tell me I'm all that she wants
If she could even talk
I feel so all alone
No one's gonna fix me when I'm broke
How do you cry with inanimate eyes?
You're never gonna smile with the way that you are
And I feel so all alone
I feel so all alone
And she sits on my shelf
It makes me think of you
The way she carries the things that remind me of who
We used to be before we became antiques
She's a lot like you
But when I hold her too tight, I know she'll break
She just takes some glue to stay
And oI feel so all alone
No one's gonna fix me when I'm broke
How do you cry with inanimate eyes?
You're never gonna smile with the way that you are
And I feel so all alone
I feel so all alone
I feel so all alone
I bought it downtown as I was on my way to meet you
She sounds the like the songs you used to sing to put me to sleep
Now that you're gone, she's all that I've left to hold
And I feel so all alone
No one's gonna fix me when I'm broke
How do you cry with inanimate eyes?
You're never gonna smile with the way that you are
And I feel so all alone
I can't be you
I thought you might appreciate
The way that she dances
The painted look upon her face
She must have come from the sun
I want to take her through the park
Where she'd tell me I'm all that she wants
If she could even talk
I feel so all alone
No one's gonna fix me when I'm broke
How do you cry with inanimate eyes?
You're never gonna smile with the way that you are
And I feel so all alone
I feel so all alone
And she sits on my shelf
It makes me think of you
The way she carries the things that remind me of who
We used to be before we became antiques
She's a lot like you
But when I hold her too tight, I know she'll break
She just takes some glue to stay
And oI feel so all alone
No one's gonna fix me when I'm broke
How do you cry with inanimate eyes?
You're never gonna smile with the way that you are
And I feel so all alone
I feel so all alone
I feel so all alone
Lyrics submitted by smileforthecamera, edited by nimchip, brechtsky, ElJay, gunflair, s7alter04, Cubicbrain
All Alone Lyrics as written by Andrew Dost Jeff Bhasker
Lyrics © BMG Rights Management, Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Hipgnosis Songs Group, Warner Chappell Music, Inc.
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This song is def a twin to "Unfair" (a song she has been quoted as saying is about falling in love with someone who is already in a relationship) so it is presumably about the same person. Given the references to buying an apartment and not being able to see her love interest "after tonight," it's most likely that she's moving away and she'll "wait a day to break the bad news" (i.e. notifying him that she's leaving once she's already gone).
And, of course, the fact that she sees in him a fellow "idealist" and "dreamer" (terms commonly given to people with the INFP personality on the Myers–Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI)) portends that she'll always be left wondering if they would've been perfect together.
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Both as a standalone and as part of the DSOTS album, you can take this lyric as read. As a matter of public record, Jourgensen's drug intake was legendary even in the 1980s. By the late 90s, in his own words, he was grappling with massive addiction issues and had lost almost everything: friends, spouse, money and had nearly died more than once. "Dark Side of the Spoon" is a both funny & sad title for an album made by a musical genius who was losing the plot; and this song is a message to his fans & friends saying he knows it. It's painful to listen to so I'm glad the "Keith Richards of industrial metals" wised up and cleaned up. Well done sir.
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@[Diderik:33655] "Your a holiday!" Was a popular term used in the 50s/60s to compliment someone on their all around. For example, not only are they beautiful, but they are fun and kind too ... just an all around "holiday".
I think your first comment is closer to being accurate. The singer/song writers state "Millions of eyes can see, yet why am i so blind!? When the someone else is me, its unkind its unkind". I believe hes referring to the girl toying with him and using him. He wants something deeper with her, thats why he allows himself to be as a puppet (even though for her fun and games) as long as it makes her happy. But he knows deep down that she doesnt really want to be serious with him and thats what makes him.
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I think much like another song “Anti-Matter” (that's also on the same album as this song), this one is also is inspired by a horrifying van crash the band experienced on Nov 3, 2022. This, much like the other track, sounds like it's an extension what they shared while huddled in the wreckage, as they helped frontman Garrett Russell stem the bleeding from his head wound while he was under the temporary effects of a concussion. The track speaks of where the mind goes at the most desperate & desolate of times, when it just about slips away to all but disconnect itself, and the aftermath.
When I listen to this song I think about how sometimes people are described as vapid or empty, like a pretty, lifeless doll. This kinda comes through in the lines "and she sits on my shelf, it makes me think of you [...] she's a lot like you," like he's comparing a past lover to an inanimate object, and maybe when he says "I feel so all alone," he isn't just thinking about himself now, with the doll, but the time he was with his lover too.