So this has been.my favorite song of OTEP's since it came out in 2004, and I always thought it was a song about a child's narrative of suffering in an abusive Christian home. But now that I am revisiting the lyrics, I am seeing something totally new.
This song could be gospel of John but from the perspective of Jesus.
Jesus was NOT having a good time up to and during the crucifixion. Everyone in the known world at the time looked to him with fear, admiration or disgust and he was constantly being asked questions. He spoke in "verses, prophesies and curses". He had made an enemy of the state, and believed the world was increasingly wicked and fallen from grace, or that he was in the "mouth of madness".
The spine of atlas is the structure that allows the titan to hold the world up. Jesus challenged the state and in doing so became a celebrated resistance figure. It also made him public enemy #1.
All of this happened simply because he was doing his thing, not because of any agenda he had or strategy.
And then he gets scourged (storm of thorns)
There are some plot holes here but I think it's an interesting interpretation.
Haven't you seen me sleepwalking 'cause I've been holding your hand
Haven't you noticed me drifting
Oh
Let me tell you I am
Tell me it's nothing
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning
Oh
Let me tell you I am
Please
Please tell me you know
I've got to let you go
I can't help falling out of love with you
Ooh
Why I am feeling so guilty
Why I am holding my breath
Worry about everyone but me and I just keep losing myself
Tell me it's nothing
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning
Oh
Let me tell you I am
Please
Please tell me you know
I've got to let you go
I can't help falling out of love with you
Won't you read my mind
Don't you make me like you
And I hear
Please
Please tell me you know
I've got to let you go
I can't help falling out of love with you
With you
Ooh
Ooh
Haven't you noticed
I'm sleepwalking
Haven't you noticed me drifting
Oh
Let me tell you I am
Tell me it's nothing
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning
Oh
Let me tell you I am
Please
Please tell me you know
I've got to let you go
I can't help falling out of love with you
Ooh
Why I am feeling so guilty
Why I am holding my breath
Worry about everyone but me and I just keep losing myself
Tell me it's nothing
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning
Oh
Let me tell you I am
Please
Please tell me you know
I've got to let you go
I can't help falling out of love with you
Won't you read my mind
Don't you make me like you
And I hear
Please
Please tell me you know
I've got to let you go
I can't help falling out of love with you
With you
Ooh
Ooh
Haven't you noticed
I'm sleepwalking
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As someone who has a history of holding onto relationships too long, I really appreciate how this song deals with that tense place of knowing that a relationship should end but feeling guilty about it.