Lyrics for LA Municipal Court as interpreted by amylouise

LA Municipal Court Lyrics
[dialtone, touch-tone dialing, ring, ring]

Thank you for calling the Los Angeles Municipal Court.
This is an automated system that can handle most inquiries.
If after using this system, your question is not answered,
please, stay on the line
and a representative will be with you shortly.

If you are calling from a touch-tone phone, please press 1.
If you are calling from a cellular phone, please press 2.
If you are calling from a pay phone, please press 3.
If you are calling from a car phone, please press 4.
If you are calling from a secret-spy phone, please press 5.
If you are calling from a princess, phone, please press 6
If you are calling from a car fax, please press 7.
and If you are calling from a rotary phone, please, stay on the line

Make your selection at any time.

[touch-tone 1]

Make your selection at any time.

[three touch-tone 1's]

For information in English, please press 1.
For information in Spanish, please press 2.
For information in Japanese, please press 3.
For information in Chinese, please press 4.
For information in Dutch, please press 5.
For information in Latvian, please press 6.
For information in French, please press 7.
For information in Yiddish, please press 8.
For information in Ig-pay Atin-lay, lease-pay ress-pay ine-nay.

[touch-tone 1]

If you are responding to a notice from the City Attorney's office, press 3.
To check the amount due on a parking ticket, press 4.
If you believe you are ticketed in error because your disabled person
placard or your preferential parking permit was clearly displayed, or
your vehicle is disabled, press 5.
For all other traffic related matters, press 6.

[long touch-tone 6]

Please make a selection at any time.

[three touch-tone 6's]

For traffic school information, press 1.
For payment inormation, press 2.
For court locations, press 3.
For general ticket and warrant information, press 4.
For court appearance and bail information, press 5.
For traffic court appointment information, press 6.

[four touch-tone 6's]

If you need to make a traffic court appointment, please press 1,
unless you have not filled out a DD form 3018, in which case,
please press 2. To receive a blank DD form 3018, please come
down to the Los Angeles Municipal Court building during normal
business hours. If you have filled out DD form 3018, but have
not reported to the City Attorney's office, please press 3.

If you are not receiving physical therapy but have a relative that
voted 'no' on Proposition 187 * and have collected a notarized waiver
from said relative, and have attached said waiver in triplicate to
said form, please press 4, unless of course, said relative is not
a naturalized citizen, in which case, please press 5.

If you are receiving physical therapy from a naturalized citizen but
have not voted 'yes' or 'no' on Proposition 187 and have not reported
to the City Attorney, but have filled out form DD 3018, please
press 6.

Of course, if you have not had your eyes tested by your local
Department of Motor Vehicles in the last three years, in which case
press 7. If you have had your eyes tested AND voted 'yes' on
Proposition 187, and have your DD form 3018 filled out and
have already reported to the City Attorney but have never been called
in for jury duty, press 8.

[touch-tone entry]

Make your selection at any time.

[here begins the touch-tone frenzy]

Make your selection at any time.

The system is waiting for a touch tone entry.
The system is waiting for a touch tone entry.

There is a possibility that you have made an error in
selecting your message. Please try again.

The system is waiting for a touch tone entry.

There is a possibility that you have made an error in
selecting your message. Please try again.

I'm sorry, but we are unable to interpret your request.
Please call back during normal business hours.

[CLICK ... sound of dialing]

Thank you for calling the Los Angeles Municipal Court.
This is an automated system that can handle most inquiries.
If after using this system, your question is not answered,
please, stay on the line
and a representative will be with you shortly.

[fades out on]
If you are calling from a touch-tone phone, please press 1.
If you are calling from a cellular phone, please press 2.

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  • 5 Comments
  • Printer Friendly Lyrics
seahen
07-28-2009

Rated 0 
Certainly one of the simpler Tool songs to interpret. I've been on plenty of phone menu systems where I needed none of the above and it wasn't listed.

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Matt Holck
07-28-2009

Rated 0 
some people just press buton randomly until the robot snaps

I got on a voice activate system said "f*** you"
and got refered to a real person

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Matt Holck
07-28-2009

Rated 0 
California Proposition 187 (also known as the Save Our State initiative) was a 1994 ballot initiative designed to prohibit illegal immigrants from using social services, health care, and public education in the U.S. State of California.

who wants sivk uneducated people running aound.

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seahen
09-05-2009

Rated 0 
I remember one time I was trying to catch a bus downtown from campus on a holiday, and I had to call campus security for bus schedules because they were the only public-sector office in the city that was open.

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mygodsthirdeye
09-11-2009

Rated 0 
OKay i think that this song is only on the record to cover up maynards dick... it is on the same track after it..... wait like 30 secs or so

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