Know something about this song or lyrics?
Add it to our wiki.
In the middle of the night I was sleeping sitting up
When a doctor came to tell me, "Enough is enough"
He brought me out into the hall (I could have sworn it was haunted)
And told me something that I didn't know that I wanted to hear:
That there was nothing that I could do to save you
The choir's going to sing, and this thing is going to kill you
Something in my throat made my next words shake
And something in the wires made the lightbulbs break
There was glass inside my feet and raining down from the ceiling
It opened up the scars that had just finished healing
It tore apart the canyon running down your femur
(I thought that it was beautiful, it made me a believer)
And as it opened I could hear you howling from your room
But I hid out in the hall until the hurricane blew
When I reappeared and tried to give you something for the pain
You came to hating me again and just sang your refrain
You had a new dream, it was more like a nightmare
You were just a little kid, and they cut your hair
Then they stuck you in machines, you came so close to dying
They should have listened, they thought that you were lying
Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up
Built the gears in your head, now he greases them up
And no one paid attention when you just stopped eating
"Eighty-seven pounds!" and this all bears repeating
Tell me when you think that we became so unhappy
Wearing silver rings with nobody clapping
When we moved here together we were so disappointed
Sleeping out of tune with our dreams disjointed
It killed me to see you getting always rejected
But I didn't mind the things you threw, the phones I deflected
I didn't mind you blaming me for your mistakes
I just held you in the door-frame through all of the earthquakes
But you packed up your clothes in that bag every night
And I would try to grab your ankles (what a pitiful sight)
But after over a year, I stopped trying to stop you
From stomping out that door
Coming back like you always do
Well no one's going to fix it for us, no one can
You say that, "No one's going to listen, and no one understands"
So there's no open doors and there's no way to get through
There's no other witnesses, just us two
There's two people living in one small room
From your two half-families tearing at you
Two ways to tell the story (no one worries)
Two silver rings on our fingers in a hurry
Two people talking inside your brain
Two people believing that I'm the one to blame
Two different voices coming out of your mouth
While I'm too cold to care and too sick to shout
You had a new dream, it was more like a nightmare
You were just a little kid, and they cut your hair
Then they stuck you in machines, you came so close to dying
They should have listened, they thought that you were lying
Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up
Built the gears in your head, now he greases them up
And no one paid attention when you just stopped eating
"Eighty-seven pounds!" and this all bears repeating
When a doctor came to tell me, "Enough is enough"
He brought me out into the hall (I could have sworn it was haunted)
And told me something that I didn't know that I wanted to hear:
That there was nothing that I could do to save you
The choir's going to sing, and this thing is going to kill you
Something in my throat made my next words shake
And something in the wires made the lightbulbs break
There was glass inside my feet and raining down from the ceiling
It opened up the scars that had just finished healing
It tore apart the canyon running down your femur
(I thought that it was beautiful, it made me a believer)
And as it opened I could hear you howling from your room
But I hid out in the hall until the hurricane blew
When I reappeared and tried to give you something for the pain
You came to hating me again and just sang your refrain
You had a new dream, it was more like a nightmare
You were just a little kid, and they cut your hair
Then they stuck you in machines, you came so close to dying
They should have listened, they thought that you were lying
Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up
Built the gears in your head, now he greases them up
And no one paid attention when you just stopped eating
"Eighty-seven pounds!" and this all bears repeating
Tell me when you think that we became so unhappy
Wearing silver rings with nobody clapping
When we moved here together we were so disappointed
Sleeping out of tune with our dreams disjointed
It killed me to see you getting always rejected
But I didn't mind the things you threw, the phones I deflected
I didn't mind you blaming me for your mistakes
I just held you in the door-frame through all of the earthquakes
But you packed up your clothes in that bag every night
And I would try to grab your ankles (what a pitiful sight)
But after over a year, I stopped trying to stop you
From stomping out that door
Coming back like you always do
Well no one's going to fix it for us, no one can
You say that, "No one's going to listen, and no one understands"
So there's no open doors and there's no way to get through
There's no other witnesses, just us two
There's two people living in one small room
From your two half-families tearing at you
Two ways to tell the story (no one worries)
Two silver rings on our fingers in a hurry
Two people talking inside your brain
Two people believing that I'm the one to blame
Two different voices coming out of your mouth
While I'm too cold to care and too sick to shout
You had a new dream, it was more like a nightmare
You were just a little kid, and they cut your hair
Then they stuck you in machines, you came so close to dying
They should have listened, they thought that you were lying
Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up
Built the gears in your head, now he greases them up
And no one paid attention when you just stopped eating
"Eighty-seven pounds!" and this all bears repeating
Lyrics submitted by Freddox
Track duration: 05:56
Add your thoughts
Log in now to tell us what you think this song means.
Don’t have an account? Create an account with SongMeanings to post comments, submit lyrics, and more. It’s super easy, we promise!
"You were just a little kid, and they cut your hair
Then they stuck you in machines, you came so close to dying
They should have listened, they thought that you were lying"
She got cancer when she was little and "they cut your hair" is the hair loss in the chemotherapy process.
She thought of herself as ugly and developed eating disorders.
"Tell me when you think that we became so unhappy
Wearing silver rings with nobody clapping
When we moved here together we were so disappointed
Sleeping out of tune with our dreams disjointed"
They had a rushed marriage "with nobody clapping" (no one was at their wedding) and afterwards they were reconsidering their marriage.
"It killed me to see you getting always rejected" She tried to get jobs but no one would take her because they knew her cancer was back and they wouldn't take someone with a terminal illness
She was frustrated and angry with the cancer returning instead of upset and accepting death, in a constant "why me?" stage. She can't take out her anger by talking to anyone ("No one's gonna listen, and no one understands") so she has to physically abuse her husband to get it out. He loves her, so he doesn't mind.
"There's no open doors, there's no way to get through" It's a terminal illness, and there's no way she can come out of it alive.
Here it comes in that she has a multiple personality disorder, perhaps as a result of the cancer destroying her emotionally as well as physically, and her entire life is written out in a matter of lines.
"There's two people living in one small room
From your two half-families tearing at you
Two ways to tell the story (no one worries)
Two silver rings on our fingers in a hurry
Two people talking inside your brain
Two people believing that I'm the one to blame
Two different voices coming out of your mouth"
Again, it suggests a rushed marriage, and then a multiple personality disorder. "Two people talking inside your brain" and "Two different voices coming out of your mouth".
It's impossible to deny that it's a brilliant song and a brilliant album, whatever your interpretation.
"But I didn't mind the things you threw, the phones I deflected
I didn't mind you blaming me for your mistakes
I just held you in the door-frame through all of the earthquakes"
this definitely reminds me of living with a family member with bipolar disorder.
"Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up
Built the gears in your head, now he greases them up
And no one paid attention when you just stopped eating
"Eighty-seven pounds!" and this all bears repeating"
and this reminds me of eating disorders, personally.
i know people have already said this, but still, this song really hits home.
A lot of people have said that they think the 'Your daddy was an asshole he fucked you up' refers to him disapproving of their relationship but I think its maybe about him being abusive and this affected her mental health. Even if it's due partly to her cancer she obviously has some problems with her mental health.
I don't think she suffers from any kind of mental disorder. If you read "Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up, built the gears in your head, now he greases them up" that explains a lot in itself as well. Her father has a major influence over the way she thinks.
First there's the song "Sylvia" which talks about depression, her suicide, etc.
hirteen is about Sylvia's suicide attempt. (Which is just like in The Bell Jar) she goes under her house and tries to O.D.
This one. Well, one of the things "daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up", Sylvia's dad's death really did take a toll on her.
Also the quote "two people believing that I'm the one to blame", following Sylvia's death, it was believed her (ex)husabnd could have been one to blame for her downfall and suicide.
I've heard the album is about a hospice and a terminally ill patient as well.
I think it supports either theory.