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I had so much to say
But no words to speak
The feelings were strong
But I was only weak
So there we were again
Tragic and absurd
Choking on every line
And every final word
A few pages from an old diary
A dusty shelf, an unread history
All these words and memories
Are all of you that's really left for me
And a fading memory
Can't cloud the pain
When the voice is gone
The words still remains
And the years that fall away
Can't stop the rains
When illusion's gone
The truth still remains
A few lines from life's long soliloquy
A dying voice in one part harmony
All these words and memories
Are all of you that's really left for me
And a fading memory
Can't cloud the pain
When the voice is gone
The words still remains
And the years that fall away
Can't stop the rains
When illusion's gone
The truth still remains
A final moment of clarity
A touch, a look, a last apology
All these words and memories
Are all of you that's left for me
And a fading memory
Can't cloud the pain
When the voice is gone
The words still remains
And the years that fall away
Can't stop the rains
When illusion's gone
The truth still remains
Where is the way
where is direction
the ever open arms
of over protection
Where is the hope
where is laughter
the wild winter dreams
of happy ever after
Deep in the night
Underneath the darkest skies
Searching for some sign or some distant light
Searching yet unheard
Repeating every line
And every final word
They remain, they remain
You still remain
All these words and memories
And everything you were to me
They remain, they remain
You still remain
And here I am again
Tragic and absurd
Repeating every line
And every final word
But no words to speak
The feelings were strong
But I was only weak
So there we were again
Tragic and absurd
Choking on every line
And every final word
A few pages from an old diary
A dusty shelf, an unread history
All these words and memories
Are all of you that's really left for me
And a fading memory
Can't cloud the pain
When the voice is gone
The words still remains
And the years that fall away
Can't stop the rains
When illusion's gone
The truth still remains
A few lines from life's long soliloquy
A dying voice in one part harmony
All these words and memories
Are all of you that's really left for me
And a fading memory
Can't cloud the pain
When the voice is gone
The words still remains
And the years that fall away
Can't stop the rains
When illusion's gone
The truth still remains
A final moment of clarity
A touch, a look, a last apology
All these words and memories
Are all of you that's left for me
And a fading memory
Can't cloud the pain
When the voice is gone
The words still remains
And the years that fall away
Can't stop the rains
When illusion's gone
The truth still remains
Where is the way
where is direction
the ever open arms
of over protection
Where is the hope
where is laughter
the wild winter dreams
of happy ever after
Deep in the night
Underneath the darkest skies
Searching for some sign or some distant light
Searching yet unheard
Repeating every line
And every final word
They remain, they remain
You still remain
All these words and memories
And everything you were to me
They remain, they remain
You still remain
And here I am again
Tragic and absurd
Repeating every line
And every final word
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I don’t think that you can really dig in to this song with the lyrics alone. The music has its own story and enhances the emotion of the lyrics. The first 4 lines of the song describe feelings that the author cannot express with words, and I think that the music provides what is missing for him.
I do agree that the main subject is someone who is gone, probably dead, but I do not feel that it is a significant other/spouse. There are hints that suggest a parent or a grandparent; these are the people that we usually have regret because of unspoken words. An old diary, a dusty shelf, and unread history… these all suggest someone older than the author, someone who has a past that was not necessarily made (or shared) with him. Another clue is the line “open arms of over protection”. I think our parents at one time or another have overprotected us all, and as we get older and we lose those people, we yearn for the protection that we felt from them.
The majority of the song is filled with regret and frustration. He has the regret of not speaking or expressing himself prior to this loss, and he has the frustration from the pain caused by his regrets. Even though he has memories, including words (both spoken and written), and images of this person… he feels like they are an illusion, which cannot hide the truth that this person is gone. The spoken words that he sings of could very well have been the last words that he heard from this person.
He begins to look for all of the things that this person taught and promised him (the way, the direction, the hope, the laughter), and he is possibly looking for a sign that his memories are real.
In the end he realizes that his memories are real, and that because of his memories that person still remains.
The last 4 lines of the lyrics now mean something opposite from their original meaning. The doubt that he had about his memories is now what has become tragic and absurd.
We should all learn from this and realize that the loved ones we have lost do live on in our hearts and in our memories, even though they are physically gone, there is nothing that can change our memories of the past that we share with them.
That's my take on it, but perhaps I'm inserting too much of my own experience into it? :)