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I lock the door
And Turn all the water on
Bury that sound
So no one hears anything anymore
Mirror lie to me, Tell me you can see
Maybe you won't be able to recognize me now
I know you can feel, All the things you steal
And you're taking, And you're taking it
Feeling so easy, Make me skin & bones
I'm always on my knees for you
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
Well sometimes it burns, Maybe I'll wash it out
It all looks so big
Nevermind, I don't feel anything
It only hurt a bit
And I still feel like shit
And I think you won't be able to recognize me now
It's easier to quit, It's harder to admit
And you're pushing me, You're fucking pushing me
Feeling so easy, Make me skin & bones
I'm always on my knees for you
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
'Cause you always win
You always win
Laughing like it works
Bleeding like it dont hurt
Knock you off your feet
Even if you need me
Tear you apart, I hate how I need you
Feeling too easy, Make me skin & bones
Im always on my knees for you
Break it like its even
When you're leaving
It's too fucking easy
Make me skin and bones
I'm always on my knees for you
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
You always win
I will burn all this
And Turn all the water on
Bury that sound
So no one hears anything anymore
Mirror lie to me, Tell me you can see
Maybe you won't be able to recognize me now
I know you can feel, All the things you steal
And you're taking, And you're taking it
Feeling so easy, Make me skin & bones
I'm always on my knees for you
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
Well sometimes it burns, Maybe I'll wash it out
It all looks so big
Nevermind, I don't feel anything
It only hurt a bit
And I still feel like shit
And I think you won't be able to recognize me now
It's easier to quit, It's harder to admit
And you're pushing me, You're fucking pushing me
Feeling so easy, Make me skin & bones
I'm always on my knees for you
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
'Cause you always win
You always win
Laughing like it works
Bleeding like it dont hurt
Knock you off your feet
Even if you need me
Tear you apart, I hate how I need you
Feeling too easy, Make me skin & bones
Im always on my knees for you
Break it like its even
When you're leaving
It's too fucking easy
Make me skin and bones
I'm always on my knees for you
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
You always win
I will burn all this
Lyrics submitted by chasing_cars
Track duration: 03:56
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I lock the door
And Turn all the water on
Bury that sound
So no one hears anything anymore
[Legit. He gets rid of the sound, so nobody hears him throwing up]
Mirror lie to me, Tell me you can see
[Mirrors lie. What he sees is a bigger version of himself]
Maybe you won't be able to recognize me now
[He wants to be so small people will be surprised]
I know you can feel, All the things you steal
[The monster that is bulimia knows how horrid it is, but it does it anyway]
And you're taking, And you're taking it
[It takes things by him. One by one.
Feeling so easy, Make me skin & bones
[Throwing up and not eating gets easier, and to him, it's making him skin and bones, what he wants]
I'm always on my knees for you
[On his knees throwing up]
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
[When will I finally be thin?]
Well sometimes it burns, Maybe I'll wash it out
[It can hurt, but he can fix that]
It all looks so big
Nevermind, I don't feel anything
[He feels bad for a second, then is happy]
It only hurt a bit
And I still feel like shit
[It hurts mentally more then physically]
And I think you won't be able to recognize me now
It's easier to quit, It's harder to admit
[It's easier to quit then it is to admit you have a problem]
And you're pushing me, You're fucking pushing me
Feeling so easy, Make me skin & bones
I'm always on my knees for you
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
'Cause you always win
You always win
Laughing like it works
[Pretending it's fine and you're not damaging your body]
Bleeding like it dont hurt
[You can bleed sometimes, but you don't admit how painful it is]
Knock you off your feet
Even if you need me
Tear you apart, I hate how I need you
[He needs to keep throwing up, but he hates that]
Feeling too easy, Make me skin & bones
Im always on my knees for you
Break it like its even
When you're leaving
It's too fucking easy
Make me skin and bones
I'm always on my knees for you
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
You always win
I will burn all this
So, I'd eat everything in sight. I'd eat until my stomach ached... But, then, I'd feel bad about it. I'd cry and drag myself to the bathroom where I'd purge everything I just ate.
I still do it, honestly.. Even though I pretend like I'm fine around everyone one else.
It's a pretty sick cycle. This song is beautiful, even with all the fucked up connotations surrounding it. <3
he is the strongest person i know (even if i dont really know him ;) ) to have a coke addiction and bulimia and insomia and still be living and have the guts to make an alvum about it is honestly the most inspiring thing to me <3
This is what the lyrics mean to me:
I lock the door
And Turn all the water on
Bury that sound
So no one hears anything anymore
~ This part is the section where he has gone into the bathroom. The tap is turned on, to disguise the sound of him purging. It's pretty self explanatory.
Mirror lie to me, Tell me you can see
Maybe you won't be able to recognize me now
I know you can feel, All the things you steal
And you're taking, And you're taking it
~ He wants the mirror to lie to him. Many people with eating disorders have a distorted image of what they truely look like, and maybe he wishes to see somebody that he doesn't. He wants to be somebody else. He doesn't wish to be recognised, as he doesn't want to be that person anymore. Stealing may be referring to the loss of hope or happiness. Because of his intense unhappiness with the way he looks, he feels like things have been "stolen" from him.
Feeling so easy, Make me skin & bones
I'm always on my knees for you
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
~ The chorus speaks for itself. He wants to be skin and bones. And wonders where "thin" is, because it's something he's dreaming of. "I'm always on my knees for you"...although this could be in reference to him being on his knees for a woman, I think this is more about being a slave to his eating disorder. A slave to what the eating disorder makes him feel like he must do, instead of what he wishes.
Well sometimes it burns, Maybe I'll wash it out
It all looks so big
Nevermind, I don't feel anything
~ The feeling of being numb. Something many people with eating disorders strive to experience. This could be the literal meaning - the sick burning as it comes out of his throat. Washing it out of his hair and clothes. Or it could have a deeper meaning, for the emotional pain he feels and how he wishes he could wash the troubles out of himself and away. "It all looks so big" - maybe talking about how he views his body?
It only hurt a bit
And I still feel like shit
And I think you won't be able to recognize me now
It's easier to quit, It's harder to admit
And you're pushing me, You're fucking pushing me
~ Maybe the purging only hurt, or something else that he has done. Again, he could be talking about emotional pain. He feels bad about himself still, and accepts that he has changed a lot. Maybe he has changed so much appearance wise, or maybe the emotional toll has changed his personality now so that although he may be physically recognisable, he wouldnt' be the person that people knew him as. "harder to admit" - people with Eating Disorders, find it incredibly hard to admit that they have a problem. And it's easier to get better once you have admitted that you have the problem. He feels pushed, maybe pushed to get better?
Feeling so easy, Make me skin & bones
I'm always on my knees for you
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
'Cause you always win
You always win
~ His eating disorder always beats him?
Laughing like it works
Bleeding like it dont hurt
Knock you off your feet
Even if you need me
Tear you apart, I hate how I need you
~ Maybe he is referring to laughing, in the hope that it may make him happy. Bleeding (probably a metaphor). "Bleeding like it don't hurt"...I take this as he's doing something and ignoring it. He can't stop the 'blood' so he's letting it flow freely. "I hate how I need you" probably refering to his dependency on his Eating Disorder, but how he hates that it's something that he DOES need when it causes him so much pain as well.
Feeling too easy, Make me skin & bones
Im always on my knees for you
Break it like its even
When you're leaving
It's too fucking easy
Make me skin and bones
I'm always on my knees for you
Break it like it's even, When you're leaving and
Thin
Where the hell have you been?
You always win
I will burn all this
this one sentence says so much for me.
so hes sick, physicaly he looks different: pale, thinner, weak, and just sick. he also would be a very different person: he doesnt have any energy, he would be more secretive,and he would be depressed because of how being bulimic is recking his life, and health.
hes a totaly different person all together, no one would really reconize him as himself befor the ed, hes bacialy a stranger.
i pritty much agree with most of what is said above. i just want to say that he might not be talking to his disease the WHOLE time. like when he says "Maybe you won't be able to recognize me now" it could mean that he's lost weight, he's pail, he looks sick, and he doesn't have any energy to do much more then simply live. hes alive but he's not living. he's not the person he used to be and people notice that he's changed in so many ways.
It's easier to quit, It's harder to admit
And you're pushing me, You're fucking pushing me
Just because i know from personal experience that sometimes when you have an issue like addiction, eating disorders, and other mental/physical dependancies/obsessions, you feel like it would be easier to quit than to divulge your issue to another. And then there are also times where someone who doesn't know what's going on is unintentionally pushing you to continue and you just want to scream "YOUR MAKING IT WORSE. YOUR FUCKING PUSHING ME."
I honestly have no idea whether josh intended for those lines to be interpreted in that way, but that's just what it means to me.
He shared this with the audience when they performed here a month ago. c:
i think that most of its pretty acurate..
same views as wherehaveyoubeen basically..
i heard it before i was bulimic, and realized it must be about this, but like most of these guys's other songs, i didnt think much of it.
now? i can defintely relate.
and its odd, but i feel a whole lote closer to Josh. Its kinda this feeling where.. i'm not alone...
"YOU CAN'T HAVE... mine........!"