I walk down my street at night
The city lights are strange and violent
I am comforted by the approaching sounds of trucks and sirens
Even though the world's so bad
These men rush out to help the dying
And though I am no use to them
I do my part by simply smiling

The ghetto boys are catcalling me
As I pull my keys from my pocket
I wonder if this method of courtship
Has ever been effective
Has any girl in history said
Sure, you seem so nice, let's get it on
Still, I always shock them when I answer
Hi my name's Amanda
And I'm not gonna live my life on one side of an ampersand
And even if I went with you I'm not the girl you think I am
And I'm not gonna match you
'Cause I'll lose my voice completely yeah
I'm just gonna watch you
'Cause I'm not the one that's crazy
Yeah

I have wasted years of my life
Agonizing up at the fires
It started when I thought that to be strong you must be flame retardant
And now to dress the wounds cause into question
How authentic they are
There is always someone criticizing me
She just likes paying hospital
Lying in my bed
I remember what you said
There's no such thing as accidents

But you've got the headstone all ready
All craved up and pretty
Your sick satisfaction
Those his and hers matching
The daisies all push up'n
Pairs to the horizons
Your hands full of ketchup
It's nice that you're trying
The headstone's all ready
All carved up and pretty
Your sick satisfaction
Those his and hers matching
The daises all push up'n
Pairs to the horizons
Your eyes full of ketchup
It's nice that you're trying

And I'm not gonna live my life on one side of an ampersand
And even if I went with you I'm not the girl you think I am
And I'm not gonna match you
'Cause I'll lose my voice completely yeah
I'm just gonna watch you
Cause I'm not the one that's crazy
Yeah
I'm not the one that's crazy
Yeah…

As I wake up to a cough
The blaze consumed the block
But poetically stopped at my apartment
And my housemates are all sleeping soundly
And nobody deserves to die
But you were awful adamant
That if I didn't love you
Then you have just one alternative

And I may be romantic
And I may risk my life for it
But I ain't gonna die for you
You know I ain't no Juliet
And I'm not gonna watch you wanna burn yourself out baby
No I'm not gonna stop you
'Cause I'm not the one that's crazy, yeah
I'm not the one that's crazy, yeah
I'm not the one that's crazy…



Lyrics submitted by zweiundzwei

Track duration: 05:58

"Ampersand" as written by Amanda Palmer

Lyrics © Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd.

Lyrics powered by LyricFind


Ampersand song meanings
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36 Comments

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  • 0
    My Interpretation:Something no one has mentioned is the lines

    "There is always someone critizing me / She just likes paying hospital"

    Reminds me of Girl Anachronism:
    "There I go again
    Pretending that I'll fall
    Don't call the doctors
    Cause they've seen it all before
    They'll say just let her crash and burn she'll learn
    The attention just encourages her"

    Also, using hospital as is and not saying "the hospital" is a British thing which may be a clue to the person she was with at the time.
    Those are my two cents. Oh, three: it's a lovely song. :)

    Flag Apparentlymeon June 22, 2011   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:"I have wasted years of my life
    agonizing about the fires
    I started when I thought that to be strong,
    you must be flame-retardant."

    I don't think that this verse is actually about how she set fires when she was young. Instead, I think that she's saying that - when she was younger - she used to put herself in risky/troubling situations to prove to herself that she could survive them. She thought that that was the only way that she COULD prove to herself, and everyone else, that she could survive them. Unfortunately, the result of this was that she just got hurt (or burned, so to speak), and now she realises she's spent years blaming herself/agonizing over it.
    Flag braille16on June 25, 2009   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:"The fire burned the block
    but ironically stopped
    at my apartment"

    Why is it ironic that the fire stopped at her apartment?

    "Lying in my bed
    I remember what you said
    There's no such thing as accidents"

    "You were awful adamant that
    if I didn't love you
    you would have just one alternative"

    Because he started it in order to kill her, because he's crazy.

    Very literal reading, I know.

    Flag wkapon June 24, 2009   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:just to add another bit,
    i know that a lot of married couples usually get twin headstones,
    so i think those are the headstones amanda refers to.
    meaning, someone wants to have a twin headstone with her
    meaning someone wants to die married to her
    which is something she doesn't want to do,
    because she's not gonna live her life on one side of an &.
    Flag tatakitenokon April 27, 2009   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:And "I'm not gonna live my life on one side of an ampersand" is such a strong, feminist statement, love it. Amen.
    Flag missmeon April 11, 2009   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:And also YES, unrequited love within a relationship definitely works, being fed up of being the only one that makes the effort and not being able to do it anymore...
    Flag missmeon April 11, 2009   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:"The ghetto boys are catcalling me
    As I pull my keys from my pocket
    I wonder if this method of courtship
    Has ever been effective
    Has any girl in history said
    Sure, you seem so nice, let's get it on"

    and those lines are so amazing and perfect and true. what i think everytime i get catcalled, heh.
    Flag missmeon April 11, 2009   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:I seriously love this song. It's about being strong and able to be single and not relying on men for happiness. The album is so good.
    Flag missmeon April 11, 2009   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:This song could be about polyamory/non-monogamy.

    If it is, I approve.
    Flag muskyisdeadon March 26, 2009   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:"Even if I went with you, I'm not the girl you think I am." Heh.
    Flag John Johnstonon March 03, 2009   Link

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