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She was lying on the floor and counting stretch marks
She hadn't been a virgin and he hadn't been a god
So she names the baby Elvis
To make up for the royalty he lacked
And from then on it was turpentine and patches
From then on it was cold Campbell's from the can
They were just two jerks playing with matches
'Cause that's all they knew how to play
And it was raining cats and dogs out side of her window
And she knew they were destined to become
Sacred road kill on the way
And she was listening to the sound of heavens shaking
Thinking about puddles, puddles and mistakes
And from then on it was turpentine and patches
From then on it was cold Campbell's from the can
They were just two jerks playing with candles
'Cause that's all they knew how to play
Elvis never could carry a tune
She thought about this irony as she stared back at the moon
She was tracing the years with her fingers on her skin
Saying why don't I begin again
With turpentine and patches
With cold Campbell's from the can
After all I'm still a jerk playing with matches
It's just that he's not around to play along
I'm still an asshole playing with matches
Blowing out my wishes blowing out my dreams
Just sitting here and trying to decipher what's written in Braille upon my skin
She hadn't been a virgin and he hadn't been a god
So she names the baby Elvis
To make up for the royalty he lacked
And from then on it was turpentine and patches
From then on it was cold Campbell's from the can
They were just two jerks playing with matches
'Cause that's all they knew how to play
And it was raining cats and dogs out side of her window
And she knew they were destined to become
Sacred road kill on the way
And she was listening to the sound of heavens shaking
Thinking about puddles, puddles and mistakes
And from then on it was turpentine and patches
From then on it was cold Campbell's from the can
They were just two jerks playing with candles
'Cause that's all they knew how to play
Elvis never could carry a tune
She thought about this irony as she stared back at the moon
She was tracing the years with her fingers on her skin
Saying why don't I begin again
With turpentine and patches
With cold Campbell's from the can
After all I'm still a jerk playing with matches
It's just that he's not around to play along
I'm still an asshole playing with matches
Blowing out my wishes blowing out my dreams
Just sitting here and trying to decipher what's written in Braille upon my skin
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Playing with fire isn't just teenagers having unprotected sex. It's teenagers having babies, too. It's dangerous, they think they know what they're doing and they don't. I can imagine this teenage mother fretted more about what to name the baby than their future life together, and so on. But that's "all they knew".
If the song's about abortion, it's that she wishes she DID have one, not that she wishes she didn't. "Puddles and mistakes", "why don't I begin again", "blowing out wishes, blowing out dreams". But you can't change the past - you can't begin again - all you can do is examine and reexamine it, lying alone on the floor of your cramped flat, tracing your scars and wrinkles...
I find it interesting in this song the juxtaposition of the small flames reckless teens play with - matches, candles - and the reality of adult life represented by huge amounts of water - raining cats and dogs, the sound of heaven shaking, puddles. Obviously all this water can easily put out those tiny flames. This also ties into the fact that she can't afford to heat her tinned soup - no "fire" left, no hope left. She does light candles for birthday cakes - Elvis', I'm assuming, not hers - but they're blown straight back out.
It's a miserable song but it's beautiful.
Don't take the braille part to literally, it's the scars/marks on her stomach that she's looking at when she thinks back on her life.
It's sad that she isn't even proud over her son in any way. But I don't think that she regrets having him, I just think that she's lying there and wonder how it WOULD have been if she stayed with that man she once loved.
yaay, I'm so happy cause now i can play this whole song on piano!!! Yay! :D
Peace, Love and ReSpekt <3
I heard this song on my iPod on my way in to work while I was going through a certain experience that is not at all related to that narrative, but I found some of the snippets of the lyrics resonating with where I was too, in ways that are more about me and my thoughts and feelings right now than about anything Regina Spektor was specifically thinking or singing:
"She hadn't been a virgin and he hadn't been a god"
- The rising power of emotion in a burgeoning relationship can make people see each other as greater than they are, up on pedestals and unfairly seen as some perfection instead of as their real selves. This recognizes that they are real people, not some perfected ideal, and comes to terms with that.
"They were just two jerks playing with matches
'Cause that's all they knew how to play"
- People can so very often find themselves acting on potentially dangerous but thoroughly enticing desires, especially two people embarking on the warm and fiery, passionate beginning of a relationship. The second line suggests not knowing any better, perhaps due to ignorance or youth, but I also feel in my case that it speaks to the power of emotion to override "logic" and how sometimes the only way to play is to accept that what could seem like a bad idea on some logical level is actually so emotionally compelling that there is no other way to play it than to see it through.
"And she knew they were destined to become
Sacred road kill on the way
And she was listening to the sound of heavens shaking
Thinking about puddles, puddles and mistakes"
- This suggests to me the result of making "mistakes" and I feel that "sacred road kill" is the idea that even the result of mistakes can be a consequence that is necessary or beautiful. I feel that many times the mistakes and what they write on your skin can be more deeply sacred and rewarding than playing everything safe and doing everything "right." Also, I like playing in puddles and damned if I care how soggy my pant legs become.
"After all I'm still a jerk playing with matches
It's just that he's not around to play along
I'm still an asshole playing with candles
Blowing out wishes. Blowing out dreams."
- Even without someone to encourage you to heights of passionate mistakes and playing with matches, each person will continue to find their own "mistakes" to make throughout their life, and with each choice they make they extinguish an alternative wish or dream, leaving that road not taken in favour of the one they choose each time. Also blowing out wishes and dreams, extinguishing flames, is a somewhat opposite gesture to playing with matches and lighting fires and getting burned. Perhaps blowing out wishes and dreams is suggesting what happens when you chose the safe path and don't play with matches. It sounds potentially more tragic to me than getting burned.
"Just sitting here and trying to decipher what's written in braille upon my skin"
- Trying to read the messages and narratives, written as experiences in and on my body and heart, and learn from the past or realize that every leap or mistake marks the experiences into an onto the body, and learning to read them and treasure them after they are done without judging them as wrong or right or regretting things overmuch is part of how a person grows.
- Tony O' the Kilt
Later when it talks about her beginning again with turpentine and patches and Campbell's I don't think it means she wants to go back--I think she wants to move on with her and her son and try and make a better life, even if she has to start with poverty. She's still young, she still doesn't know what she's doing, and she's still got wishes and dreams for a better life.
I think the very ending of the song is her dying and counting her years and her wrinkles and stretch marks as it's slipping away.
She was lying on the floor and counting stretch marks - establishes straight away that the girl in the song is pregnant. "Lying on the floor" I personally think tells us that the pregnancy was unplanned but also gives the impression of acceptance - Perhaps she's finally accepted that she's pregnant and all she can do now is lay on the floor and count her stretchmarks.
She hadn't been a virgin and he hadn't been a god - there's definitely a religious reference to this line. "Virgin" refers to the Virgin Mary and as the Bible story states that God fathered Jesus, that's what this line's about.
so she named the baby Elvis to make up for the royalty he lacked - as Elvis was typically known as the king of rock and roll
And from then on it was turpentine and patches - turpentine's an oil burned in old-fashioned lamps and I think patches is a reference to patched clothing. This line definitely gives the impression of poverty/poorness.
From then on it was cold Campbell's from the can - cold tinned food continues this idea and gives an idea of how poor the girl is
They were just two jerks playing with matches - I struggled with this line but I think it's to do with sex. The idea of playing with fire might be a reference to having sex without contraception, which resulted in the girl falling pregnant.
'Cause that's all they knew how to play - Perhaps it's the only way of life they knew. To me it means that they were young - teenagers possibly - and teenage boredom played a part in them having sex. They were bored, they didn't have anything else to do, they didn't know of any other way of life.
And it was raining cats and dogs outside of her window - raining cats and dogs suggests heavy rain
And she knew they'd be destined to become sacred roadkill on the way - I'm not sure about this line but I think she's describing her relationship, like the relationship was destined to fail. She knew it would end badly from the start but she was young and in love.
And she was listening to the sound of heaven shaking - another, beautiful, reference to the rain. Heaven shaking suggests a thunderstorm or violent weather.
thinking about puddles, puddles and mistakes - the puddles are representing the mistakes she has made in her life.
Elvis never could carry a tune and she thought about this irony as she stared back at the moon - this verse is my favourite. Elvis (the musician) was an excellent singer yet her son could never sing very well and it's ironic due to this - kind of self-explanatory.
She was tracing her years with her fingers on her skin saying - tracing her years basically means tracing her wrinkles. She's an old woman in this verse and she's reflecting back on her life.
Well, why don't I begin again with turpentine and patches with cold, cold Campbell's from the can - I think this line means if she could go back she'd have done things differently.
After all I'm still a jerk playing with matches it's just that he's not around to play along - She hasn't changed much. "he's not around to play along" this could have two meanings - 1. the boy, or the other "jerk", is dead or 2. more likely I think, he left her when she was pregnant with their child
yeah, I'm still an asshole playing with candles blowing out wishes, blowing out dreams - she's had to sacrifice her dreams and wishes in order to bring up her child. I think "blowing out" means that she's finally letting go/giving up on them because she's run out of time.
Just sitting here and trying to decipher what's written in Braille upon my skin
this skin - possibly my favourite line in the whole song. This time, instead of being a metaphor for her stretchmarks, Braille is a metaphor for her wrinkles and they tell the story of her life. "decipher" implies that she's looking for meaning within them.
I like the way Regina Spektor ends the song the way she started it. She's not only a musician, she's a poet.
I think this is a song about a woman who regrets having an abortion. She & the father were just goofing around, but she still kind of got attached to the idea of having this child. Then the father took off (he's not around to play along), and she realized she and her baby would be in poverty (eating cold soup from a can), possibly homeless or dead (roadkill). So it's turpentine (to induce abortion) and patches (to prevent another pregnancy).
The playing with matches bit -- in my local culture that's a euphemism for playing with sex. Matches are great under the right circumstances, and destructive under others. And these two were apparently bored; they didn't know what else to play.
Elvis couldn't carry a tune because he never had a chance. She's blowing out birthday candles for him, blowing out the dream of him being a singer... thinking about puddles (of blood possibly? amniotic fluid? vomit from drinking turpentine?) -- thinking about actually being a mom, wondering if she could now (tracing her years) and saying she's still incapable (just a jerk playing with matches). And trying to make out the meaning of it all, like the stretchmarks can deliver a message she was blind to all along...
Okie dokies, here is basically what I am pretty sure it all means:
It's just after the father of the child has left her, possibly from finding out that she is pregnant. She's saying how neither of the parents are perfect. When the baby is born she calls him Elvis, to give him something to aspire to in his life of poverty. After he is born, she gets into drugs and alcohol, (turpentine) and keeps trying to quit (patches) but can't. They are so poor they can hardly afford any food (cold Campbell's from the can). She then reflects on the past of her and the father of Elvis, stating that they were 'just two jerks', so they hadn't come from a well off background either. 'Playing with matches' signifies how little money she ever had, because they could only afford matches to play with, and the whole 'play with matches and you'll get burned' so they had unsafe sex, and it resulted in a child.
Raining cats and dogs is a reference to the saying, which comes from the middle ages. The peasants were so poor they could hardly afford proper shelter, so all of their animals they kept in the roofs, and when it rained, the cats and dogs would fall from the roofs. It’s basically saying how poor they were, again. It could also be saying that the animals were food for her. It was ‘sacred roadkill’ because whatever she could scavenge for food was precious. There is a ‘storm’ (something bad happening) (heaven’s shaking) and she’s thinking about all the mistakes she’s made, that has led up to it. Then it’s just a repeat and saying that nothing has been getting better.
Saying that she was maybe musically gifted? That’s why she’d never dreamed her life would be like this. That it’s ironic that Elvis can’t make a tune and so he won’t be well off. Possibly also saying that she’d called him Elvis in the hope that his name could inspire him to be musical, but it didn’t. She’s tracing her years with her fingers and thinking that maybe she should leave everything behind and start again, but realising that even if she did, she wouldn’t be any better off, because she doesn’t have any support financially, and as every year passes and every birthday cake, she makes a wish before blowing out the candles, but she’s just blowing her dreams away.
The last lines that don’t finish, that could actually be her death, when she tries to get her last sentence out, but she is too weak and dies before she can.
Her stretch marks from the pregnacy may be the braille.
"She hadn't been a virgin and he hadn't been a god,
so she named the baby Elvis,
to make up for the royalty he lacked"
- obviously not a wished baby, somehow it is impossible or "forbidden" to keep it and so she has to choose abortion. As zeroangel said before Turpentine can be used for self-induce abortions, next the two jerks playing with matches symbolizes her and the father of the baby "playing with fire", having unsafed sex as they didn't knew any better (or just didn't care) though they won't be able to care for the baby.
Also the lines "Elvis never could carry a tune" fits in it, as the baby Elvis won't ever born.