Once when our mother called
She had a voice of last year's cough
We passed around the phone
Sharing a word about Oregon
When my turn came, I was ashamed
When my turn came, I was ashamed

Once when we moved away
She came to Romulus for a day
Her Chevrolet broke down
We prayed it'd never be fixed or found
We touched her hair, we touched her hair
We touched her hair, we touched her hair

When she had her last child
Once when she had some boyfriends, some wild
She moved away quite far
Our grandpa bought us a new VCR
We watched it all night, we grew up in spite of it
We watched it all night, we grew up in spite of it

We saw her once last fall
Our grandpa died in a hospital gown
She didn't seem to care
She smoked in her room and colored her hair
And I was ashamed, I was ashamed of her
I was ashamed, I was ashamed of her
I was ashamed, I was ashamed of her
I was ashamed of her



Lyrics submitted by etcetera_whatever

Track duration: 04:41


Romulus song meanings
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67 Comments

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  • 0
    General Comment:I like how the grandpa figure is only mentioned twice, but the listener can still tell that he was a wholesome and caring person.
    Flag mofloon September 16, 2012   Link
  • 0
    Lyric Correction:i could swear it's:

    "We watched it all night, we grew up INSIDE of it
    We watched it all night, we grew up in spite of it"

    could be wrong though
    Flag hawkthewalkon December 05, 2011   Link
  • +2
    General Comment:I wrote my college application essay about Romulus, it pulled me through some really tough times. But there is nothing we can really say about it that Sufjan hasn't already said.
    Flag EvillovEon October 26, 2010   Link
  • +1
    General Comment:I completely relate to this song. The manner in which it is narrated, each stanza by a child grown older and older. He explains the apparent observations he experienced, by doesn't know what it means because he is so overwhelmed with pain and confusion, and just wants his mom to come back. My mom left us when I was ten, and though I genuinely appreciate this song, it doesn't completely portray how bad it is, at least not for me. Extremely well written song.
    Flag zinkleon February 22, 2010   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:This song i think is the best work on Sufjan's Michigan album. The relaxing guitar, occasional banjo, and soft smooth lyrics leave me breathless. I can't listen to this song and not become relaxed and put somewhat at ease in the mind. I think this song would be perfect if you were sitting around a fire, or perhaps at an outdoor concert at night, where you are the only fans there, and the full moon is shining brightly with its reflection off a lake behind stage shining bright. Dreams do come true.
    Flag llgrbllon February 13, 2010   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:I agree mostly with what has been written before; however, it is important to consider when the child is “ashamed” and when he “is ashamed of her.”

    In the beginning, he is ashamed. Ostensibly, because he did something wrong to drive his mother away. Children often blame themselves for causing their parents to separate and for their own abandonment even if their blame is irrational. Perhaps, the belief that one is responsible for causing something bad to happen is more comforting than is the alternative: that caregivers can be undependable and mothers can be unloving.

    Nevertheless, as people mature with age, develop a unified sense of self, and are no longer as dependent, they may better recognize imperfections in caregivers (notice that adolescents are good at this!). Thus, the last line of the song (i.e., “I was ashamed of her”) suggests that the shame has been redirected to the mother. The child has matured and now is able to see her for what she is: narcissistic, disinterested, self-indulgent, and unloving. She is less a mother and he is less a child.
    Flag sulkowskion December 17, 2009   Link
  • +1
    General Comment:I love how he refers to his grandfather as grandpa. Most people once they grow up, call their grandparents "grandfather", but he still calls him grandpa which adds a heartbreaking innocence to the song.
    Flag joeydangerron May 28, 2009   Link
  • +1
    General Comment:I agree with /lifewasperfect/, but could it be that their mother turned grey when she realized that her father died and she would never see him again and how stupid she was to waste her life for pleasures (constantly changing boyfriends, homes etc) instead of being together with her family, and the boy took grey hair for colored one?
    Flag z0mb1ekgdon May 24, 2009   Link
  • +3
    General Comment:the line "she smoked in her room and colored her hair" has always stood out to me, because that seems to me like something one would do to ease heartache. i can imagine their mother: sitting barefoot in the window, her just-wrinsed hair still dripping dye down her back; her eyes bloodshot from crying at the realization that she hardly knows her children.
    Flag lifewasperfecton May 02, 2009   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:it's interesting that the only thing that sufjan speaks to admiring about his mother in the song, her hair, is the one thing that he chooses to mention that changes. It may or may not be referring to the changes in his perception towards her, but I definitely think it is a sign of vanity - that despite the death of her father, she sits in front of a mirror and works on her appearance.
    it's all so interesting and beautiful and cleverly portrayed.
    Flag vivaemilyon April 15, 2009   Link

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