I think this song addresses a couple of things, the first being the inherent hypocrisy of human beings in general, and then the more flagrant hypocrisy of those in positions of authority. Really, the first few verses may be seen as an autobiography of sorts; Elliott's struggle with substance abuse -- and his friends' various interventions -- probably inspired him to write something to the effect of, "Look, we're all a little screwed up, we all do things that are bad for us, so don't point the finger at me until you've cleaned up your act." There's a lot of truth in saying we all "doll up" our public faces in "virgin white," but, ultimately, I think Smith was using some classic junkie reasoning. Drugs had taken over his life at this point, people tried to help him, so he lashed out. More interesting is Smith's take on the people "rakin' in on the world." In this day and age, I think this probably means the bureaucratic hypocrites that lead us into unnecessary wars. Take the line "But God knows why my/country don't give a fuck" for example; I can only take this as a fairly direct allusion to what was going on in the U.S. at the time of Smith's death, the so-called aftermath of a supposedly "just" war in Iraq. If my assumption is true, it probably means that this is the most overtly political stance Smith ever took in his music. All in all, the "distorted reality" of this song refers to the justifications we make for the way we act on a personal and global scale.

absolutely gorgeous. and personally, i think it's perfect as the last song on his last album... it just fits, yknow?

I agree. This is the perfect end of album song. Mostly because it reminds me of the last song on figure 8, "can't make a sound". starts off kinda simple but builds up gradually to a complex sound. both songs are 2 of my faves.

yeah it was the only way to end the album really - its sort of a feel of the music he created throughout his career and his feelings about life in general. And it does strike me as his most political though "my country dont give a fuck" can easily refer to many things... but to live in the world today a distorted reality really is a necessity to be free because everything is soo screwed up and no one is really free so if you want to feel freedom you really need to be living in a distorted world of your own...

he had a chorus on the word "fuck"...thats so awesome.

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I think it's a really political song if you think about it. The title and the first two stanzas (paragraphs? im not musician) illustrate that Smith believes society ("all you ladies and you gentlemen") has always been somewhat under an ifluence which has them believing that they are free when they are infact not. "But god knows why my country don't give a fuck" reveals that Smith thinks his counrty is responsible for this.

In essence i agree with mfluder.

I just really like that line "o.d. on easter afternoon". Redemption came, but it didn't do anybody any good because people are all inherently self-destructive and hypocritical. This ironic use of biblical references reappears throughout the song with "virgin white" and "god knows", for example. Wish Smith were around to explain some of his allusions, though.

"I'm floating in a black balloon"

He's feeling good, ethereal. But the contrivance that carries him is black, tinged with death.

"o.d. on easter afternoon "

On Easter, Jesus rose as the Holy Ghost - he was "in between".

"my mama told me
"baby stay clean there's no in between"

Mama had no spiritual awareness, but attempted to provide a practical moral framework.

"but all you ladies and you gentlemen
between's all you've ever seen or been "

There's another kind of in-between that is awash in hypocrisy and rewarded with success ("ladies and Gentlemen" he is talking to rich people - class awareness), which makes Elliott question his mama's advice.

etc.

'you disappoint me, you people rakin' in on the world'...to me it's just like, he's disappointed and let down by people who abuse the weak people on the world....I'm just assuming this because of the fact that he was a caring and kind man

a distorted reality = a drug-influenced reality. Smith is explaining his drug-taking as neccessary in order to escape from the hypocrisy and lack of justice in the modern corporate world. Fucking brilliant song, don't you just want to cry every time you put on an Elliott Smith song? I've never experienced anyone like him , his songs are so sickeningly beautiful, tinged with sadness and remorse. His talent just blows my mind, he's right about the distorted reality thing too.

i don't think it's as simple as one thing or the other. some people say the distorted reality is referring to a drug-filled life. others say it's all about human hypocrisy or government corruption.

my take on the distorted reality leans towards the corrupt government theme. it's like he's saying the only way to live in this world's most free country (or any democratic nation i guess) is to accept all the duplicity coming from our representative leaders by ignoring it or saying there's nothing we can do about it. thus, if you want to be free you have to play by their rules, which means giving up certain civil liberties. this perspective could also include the drug aspect. maybe he meant the only way he was able to manage living in such a fucked up world was to be fucked up on drugs all the time in order to help him forget that he didn't want to live in this kind of place. i could go on and on...

the true brilliance of smith's music is the way he uses very few words to convey his thoughts and feelings elegantly. then he manages to give nearly every verse or line a double meaning, sometimes three or four meanings. almost everytime i listen to a song i get a new message from it.

i'd try to decypher the other verses, but i'd probably be here all day. besides, i think the best part about lyrics is that we each get to interpret them in our own way. not only will smith live on through his music and our memories, but his music is alive and evolving _because_ we don't know exactly what meaning he intended to communicate.

as badge said, 'fucking brilliant.'

heroin is sold in black balloons.

and it's "acid blotter" isn't it.

I think this song is about how people have always pointed the finger at him and told him how he needed to clean up his act and that there is no in-between but when he looks at society he realizes that all anybody every does is live in-between black and white mediocre numb lives

What does this mean? --"sells you the heart of a black bird"
does its just mean ...now depraved.....now you fucked it up you immoral hypocritcal bastard.....noone cares about anything except to get theirs........they sold something pure and sweet.

i know that smith was a huge fan of the beatles, so this might be a stretch but what the hell. when he says "the devil's script sells you the heart of a blackbird" he could be referring the song blackbird. meaning that the devil gives these people the chance to succeed in society but they are still uncaring and hypocrticical. as if smith is upset that these terrible people are making it in life, or at least they think they are.

I always thought he said "dollared up in virgin white" but it doesn't really matter:

but all you ladies and you gentlemen
between's all you've ever seen or been
fit poorly and arrange the sight
doll her up in virgin white

I think he's singing about his experience on the Academy Awards, when he was woefully out of place among the Celine Dions ... he came out in an all-white tuxedo and played "Miss Misery" to the super-rich Hollywood crowd, uncomfortably, with an orchestra backing him. "Fit poorly and arrange the sight" seems to suggest that Elliott believed he didn't belong there.

Considering his song was easily the most powerful, important one of the nominees, and that he lost to Celine Dion's piece of overwrought trash, I think he was right...

Weird, I actually heard this on easter afternoon yesterday...

It fit so strangely.

i have trouble knowing which version i like better coz they have like totally different words/meaning

I agree with loosegravel about some of the lyrics being kiss offs to the music industry, etc, and I think 'doll her up in virgin white' is yet another example of this. After Heatmiser broke up, ES was bought out by Virgin records, who later sold his contract to Dreamworks. The double meaning of 'virgin' as pure and innocent is ironic considering his unpleasant experiences with these major labels.

I still haven't decided what I think the rest of the song means. But when Elliott sings, "a distorted reality is now a necessity to be free..." I think of Sylvia Plath's "The Bell Jar". In it Esther Greenwood lived in a distorted reality, in a bell jar where the outside world was alien and strangley configured. I wonder if by saying this, Elliott was hinting toward a possible suicide (the only way to truly "be free" from the distorted reality in which he lived).

Wow, what a song. Anyway, here's my take:

In stanza two, three, five and six, Elliott addresses a few aspects of the world he feels are screwed up. For example, in stanza two, he describes all of the hypocrisy in the message people give him about his condition. He's told in stanza one there's "no in between", meaning that there's no middleground between what we consider good and evil. Essentially, if you're doing wrong, you're bad, and if you aren't, you're good. You either are or aren't. However, in the second stanza, he sings about what liars they are because they themselves are pefect examples of people who live mediocre, "in between" lives. They claim to be moral, good, and "clean" and yet they are all very superficial and phony. This is why he sings "doll her up in virgin white". He's describing how at just about every wedding, the bride wears white to represent her purity and virginity while in fact she has already had sex and is no longer a virgin. He's just throwing in a specific instance of fakeness.

In the third stanza, he sings about how sold many people are just sell-outs and only become money leeches. All they strive for is to make a quick buck or two off of anything they can.

Then in the fourth stanza he talks about screwed up the environment has become. We now have acid rain that has been "bought up" into the air because of the power and influence of wealth. If a company has enough money, then they can get away with polluting. Interestingly, this is where Elliott includes the phrase "a distorted reality is now a necessity to be free". I'll discuss that after a few more sentences.

In the sixth stanza, he then goes on about how originally he had this belief that all of the problems of the world could be "put down to luck", as in, be attributed to coincidence and chance. That humans didn't have an ultimate say in what happens because of more powerful outside forces. However, he's realized that actually we do have the power to change things and have the say in our fate, and therefore, it's our own fault for letting the world become what it is rather than luck's. With this new realization, he finds us to be disappointing then. To believe that the all the problems in the world are a matter of chance and randomness, is to free humans from blame. However, Elliott now sees that we have the real say in what happens so that there is this ultimate element of free will. We have really been the ones who have made the decisions to have a messed up world. This is why he talks about his country not "giving a fuck". It's as if his faith in the world has finally been shattered.

Anyway, with all these things in mind, he says, "a distorted reality is a now a necessity to be free," to mean that with all the madness in this world, you have to live in your own one to find contentment. It's as if his final judgement is that this is one screwed up place and the only way to be "free" or happy is to create a seperate one to escape. That is where the question of suicide arises too because it's ambiguous as to what Elliott feels the "distorted reality" actually is. Some might see it as suicide since because it seems to them that it's really the only way to be free and find liberation. It will remain an unanswered question most likely.

Oh, and as far as the repeated lines "shine on me baby/ 'cos it's raining in my heart," he's expressing how the only thing from this world that seems to comfort him is his "baby", as in the person he truly loves. He can't help but be plagued by distress and misery from his surroundings, and all that really "shines" on his rainy "heart" is his the person, in my opinion girl, he loves. It's kind of like that feeling you get sometimes when everybody around you seems so insane and depressing and all you want is to be with the one you love.

I find this song quite touching really. He expresses his vunerability in it quite beautifly when he sings "shine on...." and so on.

What a song, what a song. There will never be another quite like Elliott Smith; that's for sure.

Oh, by the way, sorry for such a long entry. I guess I got a little carried away... It's just such an amazing song.

I love this song more for its lyrics than the actual song itself.. I think the statement is so true. A distorted reality IS a necessity, whether we all know it or not.. because, life is subjective. I distort my reality by thinking most people are not real, even though it's not true. I would certainly think of both drugs and self-harm as a way out, because they are releases. Reality can be torturous, or you have to distort it. the "people raking in on the world" part is about all those people who follow society and prop themselves for it.. "doll her up in virgin white" means, give her her innocence back, maker her whole again so she can be mine. he goes from this line to the "raking in on the world" part to go from fantasy to reality.. "shine on me baby 'cause it's raining, in my heart" just speaks of him being sad. i RELATE to Elliott. long live his music, for real

"i’m floating in a black balloon"

heroin is usually black tar, the drug dealers put in tiny balloons to sell. black balloon=heroin.

he's floating in a black balloon......he's just on heroin.

his moms telling him to quit cold turkey. you're either on it or off of heroin.

Everyone's got an idea as to what this song and any of them make sense. I love it. Elliott is one of the only musicians whose songs can have a different meaning to me at different times in my life.


The funny thing is that this song wasn't supposed to be the last track. I forgot which track Elliott had in mind before he died. Either way it is an awesome ending. Actually haha you know what i might be getting a track confused. It's late I'm tired, bored, and drunk so forgive me if i'm wrong. *it might be figure at which originally had a different track at the end

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