i really think most people are dead on with the meaning behind the song but this is what i think the structure is:
Its in two parts. In the first part she's talking to her friend, offering her advice, telling her about the married man she's in love with.

The second part is the second phone call or conversation, which starts with "late at night, i get the phone" The narrotors wife has called her up and explained her situation: how she married because her clcok was ticking but now she really loves her husband and her baby. But she's discovered that he's cheating. And the friend knows its the narrator because her husband says "he's coming out to california" Thats when the narrator knows and realizes everything. She assures her friend that he husband will never leave her for the narrator, and the narrator is falwed if she isn't free.

Its beautiful song either way you look at it. It hit hard with me when I realized that I was the other woman and not the other way around. The story ended when he didn't leave her for me. Its a really relatable song, specific enough for a story but vague enough for everyone to interpret and relate to.

"I am flawed if I'm not free"
love this song.

I'm not sure why people think the narrator didn't know the man she was having an affair with was her friend's husband. If they're such good friends, how could she not know who her husband is? There's no evidence in the song to suggest otherwise.

Anyway, I'm pretty sure she's defending herself toward the end:
Let's not forget ourselves good friend
"I am flawed if I'm not free"

That "flawed" part is what the friend used to say, so the narrator is throwing her (the friend's) words back in her face. That's why distortion is used in the vocals right there. But it doesn't matter, says the narrator, because "your husband will never leave you for me."

That's how I took it.

i think that people may see the narrator as oblivious to the fact that she is betraying her friend at first because after her friend moves and meets her husband they maintain a long distance relationship

but then if you go with the thought that the narrator met the husband and fell in love with him, yeah she obviously knew

the interesting thing is if she knew or didn't know, it completely changes the tone of the song. its so ironic, i love it.

well what i got from it was this whole time the narrator is watching the friend be with this guy that she only married because "time was running out" or whatever. and at the same time, the husband and the narrator are in love and the wife never expected the husband to leave her but she hears him on the phone one day with the narrator. i think the last sentence is sort of sarcasm like "yeah you thought he would never leave you for me, well he just did". or something.

I think that when Jenny is on the phone with her friend and her friend tells her about the other woman, she didn't know beforehand that it was her friend's husband she was having an affair with.

"Let's not forget ourselves good friend
I am flawed if I'm not free
and your husband will never leave you, he will never leave you for me"

I take those words as if Jenny is trying to assure her friend (who just found out her best friend is seeing her husband) that it's nothing serious. She'd rather be free than with someone, and that the husband will never leave the wife. Of course, all that she is saying aren't her true feelings (meaning, she really DOES want to be with the husband, but she'll sacrifice that love for the sake of her best friend).

I don't know. That's what I thought. I guess it is kind of implausible that Jenny hadn't met her best friend's husband before, though. Hm, who knows? Haha.

All Music Guide claims this song is overwrought, but I think that it works really well. After all, something like this deserves a big treatment.

Ok, I think the "good friend" isn't a literal term, I think it's just being used in reference to the fact that the song is sort of a letter to the wife or in other words, the other woman sleeping with the same guy. The first section of the song (up to "tiny face") is the narrator speaking in the 3rd person to herself, trying to raise her own spirits since quite frankly this isn't a very happy song for the singer.

The next section (up to the first "California") is where the story is explained. To paraphrase, "I live in CA, I'm having an affair with a married man and I think he loves me and not her".

Next section (up to the first "flawed if you weren't free") is her speaking to the wife. I think the "flawed" line is something the husband said his wife used to say that made him feel unwanted. (which is why he started cheating on her in the first place).

Next section (up to "better off for leavin'") I don't get the "almost dead" part, but I think it's the narrator telling the husband he'd be better off if he left her (the narrator, not the wife).

Now the rest of the song is the wife calling the narrator because she's known about the affair all along, but now she actually loves the husband, and wants the narrator to just let him go. Which the narrator wants to do as well, but she bitterly reminds the wife that's she's flawed if she's not free.

Still I don't think I'm right on this, but that's what I love so much about this song is that it leaves so much up to the listener to interpret, that and the kick ass guitar at the end.

ok here is my interpretation:

the narrator was in love with the man first and the friend kind of stole him away from her. (maybe because the man cheated on the narrator with the friends and got her pregnant, maybe not) so the narrator moves to california to get away from the whole situation.

the narrator and the man still keep in touch. (he visits her, they call each other and send letters) they still love each other. he tells her that he will leave his wife one day, but she really doesn't believe him.

one day the friend calls the narrator to apologize for stealing her bf and confesses that she only married him because she "felt her time was running out." she also calls to tell her she knows about about the affair.

i do think the narrator is kinding giving her friend a slap in the face when she says "i am flawed if i'm not free" at the end of the song (just as the friend used to say). but she assures her that the friend's husband will not leave her. i think it's kind of the narrator's attempt to get back at the friend by saying "guess what? you may have married him, but he doesn't love you. and now you're stuck in this crappy fake marriage"

i don't think the narrator is talking to her friend directly until the lines "i guess it all worked out..."
i think the first two stanzas are the narrator talking to herself about how moving away to california is better than sticking around asking herself if the man loves her.

I think the narrator has loved him and been willing to be dedicated all along, loved him enough to wait for him to come to her. And at first her friend didn't know what she wanted (I am flawed if I'm not free ), but strung him along regardless, not willing to give him her love and dedication completely but not ready to let him go completely, and eventually marrying him just so she didn't run out of time and end up alone (which I think also in a way justifies the narrator being emotionally involved with him). It's sad because the friend changed her mind, and he stayed with her, even though the narrator never had the same doubts as her friend, and always loved him completely, and was willing to wait. She waited in vain because her faultless love and dedication got her no where. Even though she is the other women I feel a lot of empathy for her, I feel like I've been her before.

here goesit:

Get a real job
Keep the wind to your back and the sun on your face
All the immediate unknowns are better than knowing this tired and lonely fate.
-shes telling herself what to do while hes gone and to keep her from thinking about him too much

Does he love you?
Does he love you?
Will he hold your tiny face in his hands?
-shes talking to herself because she knows hes married and does he really love her, because it sure does seem like it but then....who knows

I guess it's spring; I didn't know
It's always seventy-five with no meltin' snow
A married man, he visits me
I recieved his letters in the mail twice a week
-i thik again shes trying to keep her mind off of it and realizing things she had never thought of before, noticing her surroundings. then shes going back to thinking about him

And I think he loves me
and when he leaves her
he's coming out to California
-shes pretty sure he loves her and not the other girl and this is what hes said to her before, so he must love her right?

I guess it all worked out
There's a ring on your finger and the baby's due out
You share a place by the park and run a shop for antiques downtown
And he loves you, yeah he loves you, and the two of you will soon become three
And he loves you, even though you used to say you were flawed if you weren't free
-people can love more than one person. the wife maybe doesnt love him as much here

Let's not forget ourselves good friend
You and I were almost dead
And you're better off for leavin'
Yeah you're better off for leavin'
-shes talking to the guy. they cant stand being apart and shes saying that it would be better to leave his wife..hello

Late at night, I get the phone
You're at the shop sobbin' all alone
Your confession is coming out
You only married him, you felt your time was running out
-the wife finds out. i dont think they were friends before. she just calls her and admits stuff

But now you love him, and your baby
At last you are complete
But he's distant and you found him on the phone pleading saying
'baby I love you and I'll leave her and I'm comin' out to California'

Let's not forget ourselves good friend
I am flawed if I'm not free
and your husband will never leave you, he will never leave you for me
-i think shes mocking the wife like na na in your face you said that now sucks for you and sarcastically saying he wont leave.

I agree with TrickNeal and nevermeanttorhyme.

I guess I never really thought the last part was things the narrator was saying to the friend. I always thought of them as things she was thinking to herself. Like the friend never knew it was the narrator her husband was talking about.

i belive this is talking about jenny[or the narrorator] who was having an affair and telling about it. then later she's talking to the woman her friend who is married to the man is telling her about how her husband is having an affraid and i think jenny is kind of just telling this girl that she only married him because she felt she was getting too old to be unmarried and she didn't even love him until now that they're having a baby. jenny's just finding a way to tell her that they both did decieving things and now that this girl wants him and jenny knows he won't leave his wife for her, she just tells her to stay with him and that jenny will leave.

Having been through a similiar situation, I've gotten sort of a different interpretation of the song than most of you guys.

I see it less as a story of a love affair, but more as a message that you should never settle because you feel like you're running out of time to fall in love.

"Get a real job
Keep the wind to your back and the sun on your face
All the immediate unknowns are better than knowing this tired and lonely fate. "
I interpret this as find yourself, freedom, and your place in the world before you settle down with someone. Because, knowing you'll always have someone is just second best to maybe possibly meeting the love of your life.

It's kind of like that old cliche quote "Don't find someone you can live with, find someone you can't live without."

Anyways, we all know what happens when you settle down with the wrong person.
They find someone new, and fall in love.
Ultimately causing a love affair.

But, we see the person who does the opposite of the wife, through the narrarator. She's not settling, and she's ready to face the unknown to find true love. Which, also leads to unhappiness, because she knows that this husband will never leave his wife for her.

But she sees experiencing love along with hoping, and wondering if he's going to leave his wife, better than wondering whether her husband actually loves her, as the wife does.

So, it comes down to two different philosophies of love.
Is it better to have truly loved and then lost, or to just have a steady mediocre relationship that's constant and will never go away.

Personally, I'm for the first.
Because, love is able to grow between any two people if you put in enough effort.
But, when you realllllllly fall in love. It's something special between the two people involved, and cannot be replicated.
Unfortunately the second one is much more heartbreaking.

BRILLIANT.

You guys are putting an entirely new spin on the song for me. This is my interpretation~

The narrator and this guy were friends before he left. He went away and met this woman but the narrator was in love with him before he even went. He brought this woman back and she and the narrator became friends.
But the first bit of the song *beginning until tiny face* is the narrator talking to herself - just move on, get a job, keep going on so you dont have to think about what could happen, but what if he loves me? does he love me?
From that you go on to the next verse of him realizing that he love the narrator and she is happy that this has happened but now has become friends with his wife.
The wife was just in it to be in it and always felt that she wasn't herself if she was with someone but felt like she her time was running out. Sadly though she actually fell in love with him and they have the baby. And when the wife hears the call she's going on to call his friend. The narrator can't help but feel guilty because she is the other woman and befriended the wife as a way to keep the husband in her life but now she is wrapped up in it all. The only way to cut all ties is to realize her fate and she is flawed if she isn't free. And when she tells the wife "your husband will never leave you for me" she is acknowleding that he will never actually be hers.

I know that is a bit of a stretch but I've known it to happen. But it is just another perspective.

I'm going to stray a bit from the actual meaning of the song here and wonder for a moment about the whole "Mona becomes eclectic" thing. Anyone know anything about that? Nearly scared me out of my skin at the end of the song.

One of the most epic songs by RK. Anything I'd say about the lyrics has already been said.

here's what i get out of this one...
the narrator encourages her friend to get out of california and start her life...they keep in touch and they let eachother know what's going on here and there...the narrorators friend let's her know she's met a man and what not and the narrator tells her friend she's met a man too and even though he's taken she thinks he'll leave his significant other for her ("a married man he visits me i recieve his letters in the mail twice a week, and i think he loves me and when he leaves her, he's coming out to california...") some time goes by and her friend then lets her know that not only is she pregnant...she is now engaged to this man she had told her about before and about the place they got and the little shop they own and even though she's always liked being single better...she's getting married bc he loves her and they're going to have a baby together ("i guess it all worked out there's a ring on your finger and the baby's due out you share a place by the park and run a shop for antiques downtown and he loves you, yeah he loves you, and the two of you will soon become three and he loves you, even though you used to say you were flawed if you weren't free") and the narrator is again encouraging her friend and agreeing that her decision ("let's not forget ourselves good friend, you and i were almost dead, and you're better off for leavin...") some more time passes and the narrators friend calls her crying regretting her decision to marry this man bc she only did it bc she felt obligated since she felt her "time was running out" and she was having a baby with him...but she's stuck bc now she has fallen for him but she caught him on the phone with another woman and telling her "baby I love you and I'll leave her and I'm comin' out to California"...this is when we realize that the narrator has been seeing the man her friend is married to this whole time and she is trying to reassure her friend that it will never happen and that it alright bc she's always liked the single life better as well ("let's not forget ourselves old friend, i am flawed if i'm not free, and your husband will never leave, he will never leav you for me")

The last verse sounds so desperate and hurt, like even though she's doing the right thing, she really did have feelings for this man and is upset and jealous of her friend's relationship with him (but trying not to show this.)

Ok this one's open to personal interpretation, but this is how I see it:

"Keep the wind to your back and the sun on your face
All the immediate unknowns are better than knowing this tired and lonely fate."

Narrator talking to herself, after all is said and done, turn the page, move on. This is actually the conclusion of the story.

"Does he love you?
Does he love you?
Will he hold your tiny face in his hands?"

Here's where I differ from most people's view. The narrator is talking to her own unborn child, wondering if what she wants more than anything else will happen: her lover (and father of the baby) will be with her (them) in the end.

"I guess it's spring; I didn't know
It's always seventy-five with no meltin' snow
A married man, he visits me
I recieved his letters in the mail twice a week"

Narrator telling us how unsatisfying her situation is, and how time seems to stand still... in California. (pretty much a given here)

"And I think he loves me
and when he leaves her
he's coming out to California"

She's pretty much trying to convince herself, unsure what to really beleive. "I think" is key here.

"I guess it all worked out
There's a ring on your finger and the baby's due out"

We learn the narrator has a friend who seems very happilly married and expecting a baby. Things weren't always so bright but now all is great, right?

"You share a place by the park and run a shop for antiques downtown
And he loves you, yeah he loves you, and the two of you will soon become three"

Sounds comforting, and the narrator sure seems to know the man pretty well.

"And he loves you, even though you used to say you were flawed if you weren't free"

Hmm. I guess the friend's love for this man seems a bit hard to accept to our narrator.

"Let's not forget ourselves good friend
You and I were almost dead
And you're better off for leavin'
Yeah you're better off for leavin'"

There's a lot of bagage between these gals. One thing's for sure, they use to live close to one another. I beleive the love triangle is the reason the friend left in the first place.

"Late at night, I get the phone
You're at the shop sobbin' all alone
Your confession is coming out
You only married him, you felt your time was running out"

That guy sure seems like a jerk. Friend got pregnant and married the narrator's lover (in that order?) so that she could live happilly ever after, even though she always claimed she didn't need to settle down.

"But now you love him, and your baby
At last you are complete"

Settling down really isn't that bad. Really, it's great... unless your signifigant other is still seeing his ex which happens to be you old friend.

"But he's distant and you found him on the phone pleading saying
'baby I love you and I'll leave her and I'm comin' out to California'"

OH MY GOD! Alright first time I heard it it made quite an impression on me too.

"Let's not forget ourselves good friend
I am flawed if I'm not free"

That's the narrator once again trying to feel better about herself with empty statements. And this bird you cannot chaaaaaaaaaange

"and your husband will never leave you, he will never leave you for me"

The tone in which this line is delivered is important. This is not her way to say "don't worry". She's really telling herself "Who the hell am I kidding, I'm so screwed". She's also stating that the guy's word is meaningless, that the situation won't change (including him being a cheater), and that both the girls were horribly stupid to let this man in their lives and then ruin their friendship. In the end we're left with one miserable married woman and a devastated single mother.

The single mother will now need to keep the wind to her back and the sun on her face. All the immediate unknowns are better than knowing her friend's tired and lonely fate.

probably one of my favorite songs ever.

the last two lines kill me;
your husband will never leave you
he will never leave you for me

it's so bittersweet: by reassuring her friend that her husband will stay truthful, the narrator kind of realizes that she may be losing what could've been true love herself.

gosh.

Actually, I see it a little differently than most people (though I didn't read the last few comments). I don't think it's that the narrator is dating her friend's husband.

I think it's like this, in brief:

One woman gets married and finds out her husband has an affair, and the other (the narrator) stays single and has an affair with a married man.

The two friends are discussing their relative predicaments (having a cheating husband vs. being the other woman). I agree with everyone up till this point, and here's where I differ:

When the narrator says to her friend "he will never leave you for me" I don't think it's quite as literal as people have been saying (that it's the friend's husband the narrator is seeing). I think the narrator is saying something more subtle: "Men don't leave women like you for women like me." and "Women like me don't want these men to leave their wives." Not "he won't leave you for the literal me."

i love that regardless of individual interpretations (all of which i find interesting and praise-worthy), this song is different because it takes the point of view from the other woman, and the listener doesn't hate her, she relates to her. all the other songs about affairs are bashing on the cheating people, or talking about how 'no bitch better mess with my man' or whatever...this song is FROM the 'other woman' and she admits defeat, becomes vulnerable...it's like an entire twist and deviation from the social norm out there in music-land where we sing about the heart-breakers and horrible women...now we relate to the horrible woman, and admire her for admitting her loss.