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I woke up alarmed
I didn't know where I was at first
Just that I woke up in your arms
And almost immediately I felt sorry
'Cause I didn't think this would happen again
No matter what I could do or say
Just that I didn't think this would happen again
With or without my best intentions
And whatever happened to a boyfriend
The kind of guy who tries to win you over?
And whatever happened to a boyfriend
The kind of guy who makes love 'cause he's in it?
And I want a boyfriend
I want a boyfriend
I want all that boring old shit like letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
You got up out of bed
You said you had a lot of work to do
But I heard the rest in your head
And almost immediately I felt sorry
'Cause I didn't think this would happen again
No matter what I could do or say
Just that I didn't think this would happen again
With or without my best intentions
And I want a boyfriend
I want a boyfriend
I want all that stupid old shit like letters and sodas
And I can feel it in my bones
I'm gonna spend another year alone
It's fuck and run, fuck and run
Even when I was seventeen
Fuck and run, fuck and run
Even when I was twelve
And I can feel it in my bones
I'm gonna spend my whole life alone
It's fuck and run, fuck and run
Even when I was seventeen
Fuck and run, fuck and run
Even when I was twelve
You almost felt bad
You said that I should call you up
But I knew much better than that
And almost immediately you felt sorry
'Cause you didn't think this would happen again
No matter what you could do or say
Just that you didn't think this would happen again
Without or without your best intentions
And whatever happened to a girlfriend
The kind of chick who tries to win you over?
And whatever happened to a girlfriend
The kind of chick who makes love 'cause she's in it?
And you want a girlfriend
You want a girlfriend
You want all that boring old shit like letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
I didn't know where I was at first
Just that I woke up in your arms
And almost immediately I felt sorry
'Cause I didn't think this would happen again
No matter what I could do or say
Just that I didn't think this would happen again
With or without my best intentions
And whatever happened to a boyfriend
The kind of guy who tries to win you over?
And whatever happened to a boyfriend
The kind of guy who makes love 'cause he's in it?
And I want a boyfriend
I want a boyfriend
I want all that boring old shit like letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
You got up out of bed
You said you had a lot of work to do
But I heard the rest in your head
And almost immediately I felt sorry
'Cause I didn't think this would happen again
No matter what I could do or say
Just that I didn't think this would happen again
With or without my best intentions
And I want a boyfriend
I want a boyfriend
I want all that stupid old shit like letters and sodas
And I can feel it in my bones
I'm gonna spend another year alone
It's fuck and run, fuck and run
Even when I was seventeen
Fuck and run, fuck and run
Even when I was twelve
And I can feel it in my bones
I'm gonna spend my whole life alone
It's fuck and run, fuck and run
Even when I was seventeen
Fuck and run, fuck and run
Even when I was twelve
You almost felt bad
You said that I should call you up
But I knew much better than that
And almost immediately you felt sorry
'Cause you didn't think this would happen again
No matter what you could do or say
Just that you didn't think this would happen again
Without or without your best intentions
And whatever happened to a girlfriend
The kind of chick who tries to win you over?
And whatever happened to a girlfriend
The kind of chick who makes love 'cause she's in it?
And you want a girlfriend
You want a girlfriend
You want all that boring old shit like letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
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"You almost felt bad
You said that I should call you up
But I knew much better than that
And almost immediately you felt sorry
'Cause you didn't think this would happen again
No matter what you could do or say
Just that you didn't think this would happen again
Without or without your best intentions
And whatever happened to a girlfriend
The kind of chick who tries to win you over?
And whatever happened to a girlfriend
The kind of chick who makes love 'cause she's in it?
And you want a girlfriend
You want a girlfriend
You want all that boring old shit like letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
Letters and sodas"
It ends at "even when I was twelve". What happened?
I think it's great how she used to be this great
I just hate how well I can relate
You almost felt bad
You said that I should call you up
But I knew much better than that
And almost immediately you felt sorry
'Cause you didn't think this would happen again
No matter what you could do or say
Just that you didn't think this would happen again
With or without your best intentions
And whatever happened to a girlfriend
The kind of chick who tries to win you over
And whatever happened to a girlfriend
The kind of chick who makes love 'cause she's in it
And you want a girlfriend
You want a girlfriend
You want all that boring old shit
Like letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
Letters and sodas
Between 1991 and 1993, did she become more cynical about guys, or more cynical about this particular guy (presumably Urge Overkill's Nathan "Nash Kato" Kaatrud), or inclined to believe that the unilateral sentiment just made a better song?
This song (and most of the Girly-Sounds songs) are available for free at girlysound.com/. There they report that Phair, who retained the copyright to the tapes, has granted the world permission to copy them on a free-distribution basis.
i would correct that statement to "She THINKS she knows what she wants..."
and yes, it is a depressing song - its kinda like the energizer bunner that just keeps mindlessly thumping away. She is wishful for letters and sodas - and old fashioned romantic gesture, she thinks that if she could somehow go back to a simpler time that love would be easier to figure out and maybe she could get out of this loop that she's stuck in.
The song is definately about her fucking and running - vs. the guy doing it. If you listen to her other songs you can get a picture painted that she had a really hard time with relationships and did some pretty shitty things to a number of people. Everybody is young and stupid, but, i think she had alot of pain because it was particularly difficult for her.
It appears to be a somewhat open question whether the guy is someone with whom she has had an ongoing non-romantic but sexual relationship, or is a new, semi-random hook-up.
But to say simply "it's about wanting more from someone than just sex" is to miss the overarching situation and also the nuance. Wanting a truly loving relationship is one thing; engaging in at least demeaning (in her own view), potentially dangerous (if he's more-or-less random), and destructive behavior as a semi-alternative to one is quite another. Just because she hasn't found a "letters and sodas" guy/relationship is not really a good reason to wake up in the arms of the hook-up, as she arguably/apparently realizes.
And the pattern appears to be making her more bitter and cynical. She's not sure "letters and sodas" are what she really wants, as opposed to regarding them as "stupid old shit". And she is interpreting his behavior in the most negative possible light, as opposed to giving him a chance to be more/better for her ("You said you had a lot of work to do / But I heard the rest in your head"--maybe he really DID have a lot of work to do, but no, she can read his mind; "You almost felt bad / You said that I should call you up but / I knew much better than that"--maybe he DID feel bad and/or really wanted to see her again). Is that a cause of, or an effect of, the fucking and running--or both? How much is it really the guys, versus some emptiness inside her that she's trying to fill?
I just watched (for the first time) the DVD that comes with the fifteenth anniversary re-issue. To me the most interesting and insightful part had to do with two related anecdotes. As much as she says her mom is great, and as much as one has to assume that her mother was not naive to the lifestyle she was living, she comments that her mom cried when she heard the album. And she also says she cried upon listening to it again after seven or eight years. She makes a comment to the effect that she was a sad person at the time. I don't know the extent to which the song is autobiographical, versus just an adoption of a character she could relate to. But clearly it shows a perspective of someone who is sad, with a hole in her life, which she tries to fill with meaningless encounters, even as she realizes that they aren't the answer, or even a good thing.
As to the suggestion that all guys are like this, a different perspective might be that a guy who is likely to provide "letters and sodas" is probably not going to be too interested in a woman who does this sort of thing (or if he is interested, it will only be for this sort of thing, even if he is open to 'real' relationships with other women).
Now I'm regretably not too familiar with Exile on Main Street, so I'll admit that it bears further examination for this topic.
Note to all girls out there: stay away from guys with double standards.