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I thought I felt your shape but I was wrong
Really all I felt was falsely strong
I held on tight and closed my eyes
It was dumb I had no sense of your size
It was dumb to hold so tight
But last night
On the birthday in the kitchen
My grip was loose my eyes were open
I felt your shape and heard you breathing
I felt the rise and fall of your chest
I felt your fall
Your winter snows
Your gusty blow
Your lava flow
I felt it all
Your starry night
Your lack of light
With limp arms I can feel most of you
I hung around your neck independently
And my loss was overwhelmed
By this new depth I don’t think I ever felt
But I don’t know
The nights are cold
And I remember warmth
I could have sworn I wasn’t alone
Really all I felt was falsely strong
I held on tight and closed my eyes
It was dumb I had no sense of your size
It was dumb to hold so tight
But last night
On the birthday in the kitchen
My grip was loose my eyes were open
I felt your shape and heard you breathing
I felt the rise and fall of your chest
I felt your fall
Your winter snows
Your gusty blow
Your lava flow
I felt it all
Your starry night
Your lack of light
With limp arms I can feel most of you
I hung around your neck independently
And my loss was overwhelmed
By this new depth I don’t think I ever felt
But I don’t know
The nights are cold
And I remember warmth
I could have sworn I wasn’t alone
Lyrics submitted by Thistleteeth
Track duration: 01:54
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Finally the moment of truth comes and he realizes how self absorb he has been and seeing the other person in a whole new light. The relationship is at it's ending point for it was clearly not a healthy one and he is left with these strong feelings, his own romantic wishes that really had nothing to do with her.
(The nights are cold
And I remember warmth
I could have sworn I wasn't alone) - These feelings were false and were only about himself, not the other person. So he has realized he was alone in this relationship. Sadly not everybody that this happens to realizes this.
"But last night..."
Does anyone else feel like he says alone between the 2 lines? He definitely says something...
But last night
On the birthday in the kitchen
My grip was loose my eyes were open
----
This is really hitting home with me right now. I take it to mean he has regret about clinging so tightly to this girl, probably driving her away-- and now of course, now that it's over, he has a lot more clarity and is kind of saying "Look, I've changed, I won't rely on you so much anymore"
Your lack of light
With limp arms I can feel most of you
No more chest on breasty chest behind the curtain.
I'm giving up so I can be free from you.
I'm paying fees so I can sever ties from you.
Let craving call and beg and bawl, and face it tall.