We crossed the line
Who pushed who over?
It doesn't matter to you
It matters to me

We're cut adrift
We're still floating
I'm only hanging on
To watch you go down
My love

I disappeared in you
You disappeared from me
I gave you everything you ever wanted
It wasn't what you wanted

The men who love you, you hate the most
They pass through you like a ghost
They look for you, but your spirit is in the air
Baby, you're nowhere

Oh...love...
You say in love there are no rules
Oh...love...
Sweetheart,
You're so cruel

Desperation is a tender trap
It gets you every time
You put your lips to her lips
To stop the lie

Her skin is pale like God's only dove
Screams like an angel for your love
Then she makes you watch her from above
And you need her like a drug

Oh...love...
You say in love there are no rules
Oh...love...
Sweetheart,
You're so cruel

She wears my love like a see-through dress
Her lips say one thing
Her movements something else
Oh love, like a screaming flower
Love...dying every hour...love

You don't know if it's fear or desire
Danger the drug that takes you higher
Head in heaven, fingers in the mire

Her heart is racing, you can't keep up
The night is bleeding like a cut
Between the horses of love and lust
We are trampled underfoot

Oh...love... You say in love there are no rules
Oh...love...
Sweetheart,
You're so cruel

Oh...love...
To stay with you I'd be a fool
Sweetheart
You're so cruel



Lyrics submitted by Novartza

Track duration: 05:49

"So Cruel" as written by Dave Evans Adam Clayton

Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group

Lyrics powered by LyricFind


So Cruel song meanings
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36 Comments

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  • 0
    Memory:don't really know what this is about - love darkclaw's interpretation!

    When I was a teen one of the boys in our class died from an illness. The girl he had been seeing up to close before his death was really messed up obviously. I think he broke up with her because he wanted to save her from the pain of his death, rather than not caring about her. She went out with other guys, and got a bit of a hard time for it, especially after he died - I suppose we were all grieving and it was hard to watch her try to move on. The funny thing is, that she was definitely still in love with the boy that had died, and the new guy, despite being crazy about her, couldn't do anything right to please her.

    I was listening to this album a lot at the time, and this song seemed to really fit their situation (still does kinda!) and will forever remind me of them.
    Flag blue412on April 03, 2012   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:After revisiting the song, it does kind of sound like he's lamenting over losing his significant other who isn't as confined in normal relationships to the rules of fidelity and all that, so she [her] "lips to her lips..." to stop what lie, I don't know. But it sounds like he's in love with a beautiful bi-sexual woman whose cruel to the fact that he wants her solely for himself. Maybe he doesn't want her sharing her love around. I don't know, maybe I'm wrong.
    Flag GrungyBeatleon January 13, 2011   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:Darkclaw... that is so true. I always, always, always thought the song was about a man losing the woman he loves to another woman...
    Flag EnduringChillon October 30, 2010   Link
  • 0
    Song Meaning:This song was actually written about Adam Clayton and his ex, not The Edge. I thought in fact Adam wrote it. Could be wrong but I remember hearing that in a ZooTV era interview.
    They are Gods either way.
    Flag ortizmo34on August 17, 2010   Link
  • +2
    My Interpretation:The song is about a couple who drift apart after trying to enhance their sex life by the introduction of another woman into their lovemaking. At the beginning, the male speaks in the first (and second) person to his female lover. He immediately suggests regrat and his blameing of his female partner for coming up with the idea of enriching their love life with a bi-sexual / threesome experience.

    "We crossed the line
    Who pushed who over?
    It doesn't matter to you
    It matters to me"

    She insists it doesn't matter where the idea came from, what's done is done. It does matter to him, suggesting that he was satisfied with their relationship, but she wasn't.

    "We're cut adrift
    But still floating
    I'm only hanging on
    To watch you go down,
    My love"

    They are drifting apart from one another, yet he remains for the sexual experience, as opposed to the emotional one. As well, this is an obvious reference to watching his lover perform oral sex; however, it does not indicate if he is watching her go down on him, or another person.

    "I disappeared in you
    You disappeared from me
    I gave you everything you ever wanted
    It wasn't what you wanted"

    This suggests the disconnect they have been feeling during heterosexual intercouse. He disappears in her (sex) and she disappears from him emotionally. The paradoxical statement following that suggests he has tried everything she demanded to fulfill her sexual needs, but it wasn't enough. Hence, a new partner is introduced.

    "The men who love you, you hate the most
    They pass through you like a ghost
    They look for you, but your spirit is in the air
    Baby, you're nowhere"

    A suggestion to the emotional distance from men the female partner has always seemed to feel. Perhaps it's not men she desires, yet because of the societal expectation of heterosexuality, she cannot express her bisexuality or homosexuality openly.

    "Ohhhh
    You say in love there are no rules
    Ohhhh
    Sweetheart, you're so cruel"

    If there are no rules in love according to her, this is further evidence suggesting she is the one who desires to break the morays of monogamy in order to fulfill her desires, and he calls her cruel for this, obviously hurt by her apparent rejection of him and his inability to satisfy her, despite the love he feels for her.

    "Desperation is a tender trap
    It gets you every time
    You put your lips to her lips
    To stop the lie"

    Desperation for sexual fulfillment seems to have captured the female in a trap of desire -- continually wanting those same desires fulfilled. Desperation to make her happy has trapped the male partner into allowing the relationhip to become "open". Once this is done, it is difficult to get back to exclusivity. "You put your lips to her lips to stop the lie" is crucial here -- Everyone here normally assumes a change from the first person into the third; however, if we assume the speaker does NOT change here, then the "you" remains his female partner, which makes the "her" being kissed another woman. The lie being stopped then also changes drastically... the lie she stops is the lie of her heterosexuality and the lie of their male-female relationship.

    "Her skin is pale like God's only dove
    Screams like an angel for your love
    Then she makes you watch her from above
    And you need her like a drug"

    If the speaker is still speaking to his female lover, then this again becomes a commentary on the sexual relationship between the two women. "need[ing] her like a drug" then is suggestive of the female's true desires becoming inescapable. She needs to be with a woman to be happy, making the man feel obsolete.

    "She wears my love
    Like a see-through dress
    Her lips say one thing
    Her movements something else"

    The fact that he says "my love" again indicates that a shift from the first person never occured and the use of "her" did in fact refer to a second female. This is where the song becomes much sadder, as we see the woman's inability to simply admit her homosexuality; she continues the lie of the relationship with a man in order to live up to the expectations of others. He seems to truly love her, but she "wears" that love like a see-through dress; it's superficial and external only. And he knows it. he can see that she's pretending, but still loves her anyway. Sad.

    Trampled by both love and lust? Seems that each person in the relationship is suffering.
    Flag darkclawon July 07, 2010   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:Plain and simple explanation about what this song is about, simple in the sense when I tell you what to google you will have a holy sh*t moment, if you google "borderline personality ex" you will find out all about these women (and men, a girl can change the she parts to he, and it will still work). If you have a strong connection to thudding chances are your ex is a borderline or bpd, and you are a non, these folks see 2 ways when it comes to others (black and white) no grey area whatsoever, you are either good or bad, their logic and empathy is like that of a four year old, there is no true understanding. As an ex of a borderline you are left wondering how and why this person could flip at the drop of a hat, cut you out, and move on. Understand, these individuals are tortured souls looking for love, but their fear of abandonment is so great and often without merit, answers or understanding.. You will never get closure from this person because the inner turmoil makes them unable to rationalize or cope. How do you explain I am leaving you because I know somewhere, somehow you are going to leave me. The defense mechanism that is so irrational pushes them further away, the more you love them and reassure them, the harder they resist. They are prisoners of their own distorted mind but without therapy lack the coping mechanism for them to see wrong and irrational behavior. They are never wrong in their mind, but so obviously wrong in the non bpd in which they are involved. Bpd's do this with friends as well, some are abused as children both physically or mentally.

    Ultraviolet is another song that touches this topic, as I discussed being in the black a bpd views others as bad, Bono writes, " I'm in the black, can't seen or be seen" that is how a bpd views you in the black.

    Don't believe me, have an ex that makes you think of this song ? Google what I said, been there, done that. Licking my wounds.
    Flag IrishJohnon March 17, 2010   Link
  • +1
    General Comment:good thing my boyfriend sent me this song a few months ago to listen to! that was the only time he ever sent me a song he wanted me to listen to. talk about being secretly resented. oh well, i've been there before too, just not on this side. great song
    Flag fairydust9on January 02, 2010   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:"Between the horses of love & lust we are trampled underfoot."

    BRILLIANT!!!!!! Thank you Bono.
    Flag mced7on December 11, 2009   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:This is poetry at its finest. Amazing work by Bono.
    And if it is about Edge's divorce, can you imagine the emotion felt whenever he plays this? I'm sure he's a bit desensitized by now, but still.
    But more importantly, I think it shows the bond between The Edge and Bono....which is one of the reasons this band has lasted so long.
    This song gives me chills.
    Flag justwinon October 29, 2009   Link
  • 0
    General Comment:We crossed the line
    Who pushed who over?

    These first two lines say it all to me. I, too, thought this song was about unrequited love, but taken one step further. The subjects of the song have had an affair, but who started it?

    And you don't know if it's fear or desire
    Danger the drug that takes you higher?

    Fear and desire, two necessary elements in a love affair. So afraid you may never again feel that way, or terrified that you might get caught...either way the desire takes over.

    Then she makes you watch her from above
    And you need her like a drug

    The man is now on the outside looking in, having lost his love.

    This song really speaks to me because I have been in this situation. Many years ago I had a steady man in my life but had a fling with someone else. He loved me but I was unwilling to leave my steady for him, so we ended things. He was crushed. We all worked together which made it much more difficult on him. My biggest mistake was staying with my steady and not following my heart.

    Flag lynnva68on October 01, 2009   Link

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