Icicle

When I was in the 6th form, for one class, we had to bring in some songs and talk about the meaning of them. I chose this one. The choice raised a few eye brows at any rate, as did the explanation that I gave. I remember reading an interview with Tori in either Q or Vox magazine not long after the 2nd album came out (she was on the front cover in a white vest - a sort of homage to an advert featuring Kate Moss that was around at the time). Anyway, in the interview she talked about this song being about masterbation and how she had a crush on Jesus as a kid, so she used to fantasise about making love to Jesus (it figures - he may have been a strong male presence in her house as a child and he's always drawn to be hansome). That passage of the song seems to talk about how sex seems to be missing from the bible ("I think the good book is missing some pages"), so they are downstairs worshipping Him in one way by taking of his body (i.e. eating the bread/wafer) and she's upstair doing it in her way - taking from her body in his name (i.e. thinking about sex with him). The "monster in our Easter dresses" is a refrence to genitals and the way they are demonised (Queens of the Stone Age did a song about a woman who had a "monster in her parasol" - again a similar concept). The icicle could be considered phallic, or it just could be that it's something cold or, more probably, a bit of both.

MASTURBATION

This song is about masturbation. Icicle is the name of the device she is using. C'mon people, this probably the most obvious lyrics she's written.

i did wonder if icicle was a song about molestation as per previously mentioned. perhaps the icicle relates to the coldness of the hand of the molester? not sure if the perp(etrator) is one from the church but i thought that while the perp was on the one hand going on about the wonders of the good book, tori is debating whether the perp's good book is different to her one cos' the one she reads doesn't have anything about molestation being normal? also, the bit about everyone singing downstairs while he's getting in her pumpkin pjs upstairs could be referring to the obliviousness and 'trust' that people may have in religious figures, even though some may not be as holy as they appear cos' he's taking advantage upstairs. and right at the end of the song - she should've/could've flown, but didn't.

i think the piano bit at the start is a nice preempt to the song cos' it starts all sweet and ends all bitter and off key - is it musically creating the following scenario whereby a man of the cloth takes away the innocence in the most wrong way ever?!

dunno. it's a deep and well written musically and lyrically song. but then most of tori's stuff is.

"In Icicle I try to win back the innocence of my childhood. That girl that masturbates to survive, the vulnerable, innocent flower, has always done good things for us. She's had to fence off certain parts of herself to get ahead. Now it's time to light the candle and melt those parts. Who dares to open him- or herself can also forgive themselves for not having stood up for themselves enough."

"And when they say take from his body I think I'll take from mine instead"

That was my high school quote when I graduated. Only me and 1 other person knew what it really meant.

I do believe the song is about molestation and the loss of her childhood for which she was told to find solace in religion, but found greater solace in self-love.

An icicle, similar to one's childhood, can melt away and never return. Personally, the piano intro creates an image in my mind of a child playing innocently, and then curiously, and then there's intense trouble, and then melody begins leading into the first verse as her last hope, or her "hiding place."

She talks of having a hiding place as spring "marches in," as opposed to the usually gentle transition from childhood to adulthood. Also, she emphasizes "MY hand touches MY self," as opposed to someone else's hand.

The "I could have, I should have" part is a very common thought as an adult remembering a traumatic childhood experience. You always think of things you could have or should have done differently, but you cannot blame yourself for having the rationality of a child when you were one.

I've only been listening to Tori for a few weeks, but the more I do, and discover new songs, like Icicle, the more I become convinced that Tori was sexually abused by her father. The constant juxtaposition of Christian and sexual images, and her clearly tortured state in reference to same, e.g. "Crucify". In "Icicle", a phallic symbol, we have "greeting the monster (phallus) in our Easter dresses, father says, 'Bow your head (submit), like the good book says', Well I think the good book is missing some pages, Gonna lay down." And at the end she says "I could have, I should have flown, you know, well I could have, I should have, I didn't so..." She blames herself. In the song "Winter" which is about her dad, you also have the the cold imagery, like the icicle. She has a bond with her dad, but it is cold. Sexual abuse of any kind traumatizes, but incest and with a minister no less, truly would throw one into total disorientation. Hence the need for cryptic lyrics. One doesn't talk about incest in polite society, but she needs to exorcise her demons. In "Precious Things" we see that she has sexualized herself in an attempt to get love from those Christian boys, those beautiful boys, but her rage is still there and she wants to smash their faces and spit in their faces. Having been sexualized as a child, that's the best way she knows to try to get love and approval, by giving sexual favors to people who are only using her. This theme runs through many of her early songs. And she sings them so poignantly. It's heartbreaking when you realize what she is really talking about.

I had always taken from this song.... Children of sexual assualt, well 99% of prostitution workers both male & female have childhoods of abuse & confusion of beliefs & ethics they slowly melts away like an icycle frozen untill spring comes.

One of my real favorites! Winter's leaving & fragile icicles are melting... Tori's always had (& probably has still) interesting discussions about the bible with her father (a priest!). She had a special view on the religion "stuff". "The book surely misses some pages" - just think about the three Eves (nevermind...)! Kind of unconventional to masturbate, when the other's are at mass... But then again: no taboos! I love that line:

"he's in my pumpkin p.j's lay your book on my chest feel the word feel the word feel the word feel it" --> Intense!