Swing life away.

  • Friendship. Friendship is one of the few things that never fails to make me smile. One friend in particular keeps me going. I see his intelligent blue eyes, his glasses, his braces, his gelled hair, and I think, "Wow, could anyone be more beautiful?" People see him as a nerd. This is my best friend. I had nothing else to do tonight, so I was looking through old photos of my summer camp. This is where I met my best friend. Sure, he lives seven hours away. Sure, seeing him again would be a huge deal. Sure, I haven't heard his voice for months since our last phone call. But I listen to Swing Life Away, by Rise Against, and I think of him again. I think of camp, where I was singing Swing Life Away to myself: "I'll show you mine if you show me yours first." He looked up at me, puzzled but pleased, and sang back, "Let's compare scars, I'll show you whose is worse. Let's unwrite these pages and replace them with our own words." It may be silly to want to put the 'best friend' title on anyone at all, let alone a gangly sixteen year old boy that none of my hometown friends have ever met. Yet, this is the person I turn to. Distraught, a simple text message saying, "I'm sad. Cheer me up." His responses each time make me want to cry -- and I'm not the crying type. It makes me sad to know that I can't spend time with my best friend, that when he hurts, I can't tell him how wonderful he is. When our friendship was green, he vented to me, he asked for advice. He was battling a slight eating disorder, confidence issues, among other things. He sent me a message once, saying that I helped him through the hardest time of his life. He sent me another message saying that before me, he didn't understand the meaning of love. I've known for a while now that I depend on him. At camp (the one place where I truly wear my emotions on my sleeve), we were inseparable. In the departure ceremony, I cried on his shoulder for a good ten minutes. This means the world to me. In emotional parts of certain sessions, I'd prod him and he'd hold my hand. He always says how without me, he'd be lost and would have nobody to advise him. Our friendship is unconventional. I feel closer to him than anyone in my hometown, and I've known most of those people for as long as I can remember. This boy who spent a total of perhaps 15 days with me... I love him. I love my best friend. I don't know where this entry is coming from, but upon looking at those old camp photos, I just wanted to write about the strongest emotion I think I can comprehend at this moment, and that is the love in my friendship. I don't know if it makes me lonely that I can't find even moderate friendship where I am, or if it makes me happy that I have a strong friendship with someone elsewhere. Either way, just thinking about my best friend makes me smile. We can live on front porches And swing life away We get by just fine here on minimum wage If love is a labour I'll slave 'til the end I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand.
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