I’m thinking about how I am not doing anything with my life. I’ve been graduated for just over a year, and I still don’t have a career in my field. That’s not really such a big deal though. It’s really more the fact that I don’t have much motivation at all to look for one. The whole idea of it is kind of terrifying, actually. Maybe it’s the thought of the responsibility, or having to be a grown up, or too many people relying on me, or complete and utter failure. But I suppose that’s normal, right? I’m having a hard time with the transition from semi-irresponsible, drunken, carefree college student to a real person with an established life of my own. I can’t even picture myself that way. While many people that I went to college with are engaged/married/pregnant/all of the above, I cannot imagine that being my life. I feel like I’m running out of time… For what, I’m not sure. But in the grand scheme of things, 23 is young. Right? Right.
buggie92 (2012-01-19 16:40:20) said: I feel like I'm missing out on single life, even though I've been there before and all it is for me is loneliness and resentment.
You're what, 17? So, this single life you speak of was from the ages 0-16ish, yeah? I hardly feel that counts as “single life,” let alone any kind of life relationship-wise. Now that you’ve had a relationship (and a meaningful one at that, hopefully), whenever you do enter the single life you’ll be more confident both about yourself, and about your actions with girls. That’ll help immensely with alleviating a lot of the loneliness and resentment you felt before. But, you’re young. If you’ve got a good thing going, why end it? You’ve got all the time in the world, and if you’re happy you deserve to stay that way. Things are going to change very quickly at your age, especially after graduation, no matter what direction you decide to go in. Don’t worry about things becoming too final or anything like that. The single life will be much more fulfilling once you’ve gone through the relationship stuff. I’ve been single for almost 2 years (the first and longest time I’ve been single since I was 15), and I must admit it’s been very, very nice. Until I’m ready to start looking again, that is. I’m learning a lot about myself, what I do and don’t need and/or want, and the freedom is nice too. Being able to spend time with whoever I want with no expectations or attachments is a relief. No attachments on my end, anyway. It’s always the guys that need to work on that part. Anyway, you’ve got a good head on your shoulders. Take things as they come, and don’t take them too seriously. You’ve got plenty of time for the things you feel like you’re missing out on. You’d just be missing out on something else the other way around, anyway.
Leblanc (2012-01-19 21:49:19) said: So that's what I'm thinking about, how the hell am I going too come out to my parents?
It was probably hard enough for you to tell that to us. Baby steps. :) Just because you’ve finally got it all figured out with yourself doesn’t mean you’re suddenly on a countdown to tell everyone. Take the time to get comfortable with your revelations first, you’ll eventually figure out how and when to tell them. I’m proud of you!